Love and a Taxi Uncle

I've taken many cabs in Singapore before and many taxi uncles have made it a point to talk to me and share snippets of their life story with me, even if the journey's a short 10-15minutes. Maybe some tales are true and others are exaggerations, whatever they are, they always make for interesting stories.

Today was no exception. I was on a journey from Kembangan to Tampines and the uncle started talking from the moment I got on. It didn't help that he drove at 50km/h or less, even on busy roads.

He spoke fully in English and sounded like sincere, genuine man.

Along the way, I found out that he used to be in the construction business and had projects in Shanghai, Beijing, Qatar, Abu Dhabi and some other Middle Eastern state I can't remember.

He told me he was twice divorced and had once owned four private properties, two of which were gone after his first divorce and the remaining two disappeared as well after his second divorce.

In this context, he told me....

" I don't believe in love anymore. I tell you, love is poison. Love is poisonous! You see, married twice, divorced twice, now I am just a poor man. Poor in heart, poor in life, poor in bank. You tell me, what is love good for? What is it good for at all?"

I did not answer. I just smiled at him through his rearview mirror. What more could I say to a jaded uncle who has seen much more than me?

He smiled back though, with a small touch of nonchalance. Although his words do not show it, he seemed like one who has taken everything that life's ever thrown at him in his stride.

I hope I made his day just by listening to him and providing him an avenue to rant.

Time flies

It's been 2 months since I shifted in. And I'm still trying to get used to being called "Mam Michelle" by the helper lol.

I'm getting used to not having to do the dishes though hehe.

The commute to and from office is much easier now. Just a direct bus ride, no need to switch trains or jostle with the crowd. And the stops where I take the bus somehow always have enough seats so I don't need to stand.

Murphy's Law

It's one of those days when I feel tired and "nua" and so I dress in a "nua" manner as well.

And then I'm told that there's a meeting which was scheduled at the last minute with a VP from Google.

FML.

I'm no longer in Suntec where I can go buy something nicer or what. :(

Oh dear, I hope he doesn't mind my shabby dressing today.....

the shell is not doing too good

I hate yeast!!! (Except the ones used in baking and cooking of course.)

OH I HATE YEAST!!!!!!!!

And I hate the discomfort and inconveniences. :( :( :(

Happy Anniversary

Today marks the 5th year I am with this company.

I don't really remember much of my first day on 17 September 2007 except that I joined a bunch of colleagues for lunch at the Suntec City Mall foodcourt. 5 of them have since left the company with the latest one leaving just at the start of this month.

It's been a relatively good 5 years, with opportunitiesto lead projects and also to see other parts of the world. I've definitely grown somewhat, though I could still do much more and grow much more.
I am thankful for a boss who takes care of us and with whom I get along quite well with.

Here's to more good and hopefully productive years!

Happiness is

• when the last person I see before I sleep and the first person I see when I wake is K
• having a simple lunch with my parents, chatting, laughing and gossiping over a cup of tea
• waking up at 945am on a Monday knowing that I need not rush to get ready for work
• munching on sotong balls
• knowing I'll be catching up with loved ones and close friends soon over drinks and a nice meal
• buying a new pot of fittonias
• lying on the bed and staring out the window at the bright blue skies

:)

...............

Oh ya!!

I just realized that there was something we forgot to do during the morning activities on our wedding day.
We didn’t do the “throwing-of-the-wedding-bouquet” thingy. The part where the bride stands with her back facing her single jiemeis (and single xiongdis if they wished to join in) and throws the bouquet over her shoulder towards them.

2 of my jiemeis are still single and available. And at least 2 or 3 other xiongdis too. It would have made for some fun lol. Missed photo opportunity as well.

faire la cuisine

It's been a long time since K and I cooked anything together. The last time was during Chinese New Year I think, when we roasted chicken for his family. That was more than half a year ago already.

I think it's high time we dig out some interesting recipes and flex our cooking muscles again!! Be it sweet or savoury, anything goes!

Granny with an ATTITUDE!

 

  Haha. Granny is doing much much better these days. She talks voluntarily and rattles on about things that come to her mind. She smiles and jokes and laughs. Her appetite's back to normal. She's feisty when she doesn't like certain things and chortles when she sees something she likes or approves of. 

Dad sent me this photo of her when I was working overseas last week. :) Apparently Dad told her to strike a pose and she did this. Lol...

feeling bookish again

It has been a long time since I've read a book. Up to 2 years ago I was reading novels and non-fiction books at the rate of one each month. I think I've gone without reading a book for more than a year already. Opps.

Maybe I should pick one up again now that I'm regularly taking the bus to and from office. Long bus rides make for ideal book-reading time.

Perhaps, Paulo Coelho's The Alchemist shall be the book to get me started again. I've read it before but more often than not, when you re-read some books, you still get to learn new things because you pick up on things you missed previously.

Bonding in a different way

We went for lunch at Peach Garden at White Sands today. An early celebration for my mum's birthday which is still about 2 weeks away. And then we were "dragged" to the Timezone arcade at the same mall. The whole family ended up playing games for more than an hour haha.


Lately, my mum, nephew and sister-in-law became hooked on two of the games machines. One is a spoof of angry birds and the other involves you catching fish and scoring points. Hence today's trip to the arcade after lunch.

When I was growing up, I didn't really visit any video/games arcade as I didn't understand the whole mechanics of it. Most games were violent and confusing and involved you parting with alot of your money in a very short period of time. Plus, the arcades were frequented by alot of ah-bengs during those days.

So it came as a pleasant surprise to me that the whole family could spend so long there at the arcade. It was good clean fun though. Noting violent, nothing unhealthy. And it brought smiles to all of us. :)

Those bright moments of sunshine

Last Wednesday afternoon, my father-in-law sent me to the airport. I was leaving for a work trip. I remember thinking to myself in the car that this would be the first time K wouldn't be there to see me off at the airport (well, except for those times that he was away for studies haha.)

I stepped into the airport, checked which way to go to and turned around to walk to the check-in counter. And then voila...K was there! :) He'd snuck off from work to be at the airport to see me off. It was a lovely lovely surprise and I sure was mighty touched haha.

Thank you Baby...:D

money money money

When I was running a hostel committee back in my second year in uni, we had to source for sponsorships and funds for the event we were organising.

It seems like dejavu now. Scrambling to get our teeth into any piece of fund we can find for our event next February.

This work trip has brought us some measure of good news in terms of sponsorships. Some organisations have committed their funds to us. While we are still far off from what we need, I am still happy.

On a separate note though, I have some people avoiding me now because they know I am seeking sponsorships. Oh the woes of work!

Phnom Penh

This was a strange work trip. Aside from me (and my colleague) being bored and not wanting to come, I’ve also met with situations that I’ve not encountered before.
Hotel
I stayed at a swanky hotel-cum-casino. The first floor was the casino. I’ve never seen such a set-up before. The casino was open. Anybody could walk in and out. It was strange because to me all casinos had a controlled entrance and exit. Gamblers, prostitutes, aunties, uncles, tourists and croupiers were milling around the tables and jackpot machines uninhibited.

Presentation
I botched my presentation somewhat. Though people knew I was from Singapore, I forgot to introduce myself (mega boo-boo) and spoke like a train lol. But I guess I met my objective. To have the presentation as short and sweet as possible.

Socials
Met up with good friends, most of them Taiwanese, Chinese, Hong Kongers, Malaysian and Indian. Met up with THE Internet pioneer in Cambodia whom I knew from my past travels. It felt good to catch up with him though initially he couldn’t place me and thought I was a Cambodian. Sigh.

Tummy
I felt a little strange on the day that I flew from Singapore to Phnom Penh, which was Wednesday. And wasn't doing too good all the way till Friday. :( Had to take some diarrhoea pills here and there.

Snatching
I don’t like places which are messy. I feel unsafe. I’ve been to Phnom Penh before and I certainly did not feel that unsafe during that trip. This time it feels different. I see a messier Phnom Penh. People are still friendly and generally hospitable and helpful. But somehow I am seeing seedier streets and areas.

Five of us ladies were in a tuk-tuk to a social dinner function. While we were still in the tuk-tuk, my colleague’s mobile phone was snatched from her hands just 10m from the restaurant we were going to. 2 men on a motorbike zoomed past our tuk-tuk and reached in. One pulled her hand and tried to get her bag but it was hooked around her arm. The other guy managed to get her mobile instead. She screamed.

It happened right in front of my eyes and was over in just 2-3 seconds. We were all shocked. She was a little shaken as well. It was a Galaxy Note. Ouch. She bought it for $800-odd only 6 months ago. But whatever it is, we were thankful that it was only a snatch theft and that the guy who did it wasn’t carrying any knife.

Eye-opener
In my entire life, I’ve only ever been into a police station once to make a report. And that was for the loss of my identity card. Because of the snatch-theft incident, I accompanied my colleague to make a police report. I not only visited two police stations within Phnom Penh, I also had the opportunity to pop by the Foreign Relations Agency, which turned out to be a nondescript small space amongst small shops selling knick-knacks.

The police stations were really just small shop spaces with some wooden tables within. Chairs were those plastic chairs you’d see in our coffee shops. There would be at least one CRT TV within the station, usually blaring some Cambodian or Korean MTV station. We’d be stared at whenever we stepped into a post. And I was very glad that we had a hotel staff accompany us the whole time. I saw a suspect as well. Not in handcuffs but in chains and lying on the ground. His hands were chained to window grilles and his feet were bound together in chains. To put it crudely, he reminded me of a trussed chicken lying on the ground.

Osmosis

I was watching Caesar Milan's Dog Whisperer on TV a few nights ago. He spoke of how dogs pick up on your emotions and feelings and state of mind and will act in the same manner. Eg. If you're edgy and nervous when dealing with the dog, it'll get edgy and nervous too. If you're calm and collected, the dog will pick up on your steady vibes and be more calm as well, and hence be easier to handle.

It brought to mind something I was observing from time to time on how kids pick up things from their parents. I'm not talking about the conscious things parents teach their children, more like the unspoken subconscious behaviours, mannerisms and emotions that children sense and pick up from their parents.

My mum's a paranoid person at times. She's edgy and nervous at other times. And I know she definitely passed those onto me. No, she didn't teach me to be that way. Just being with her all through my childhood and formative years was enough to let those emotions and behaviours permeate me.

My sister-in-law's a quieter person. She's calm for most of the time though she's got her neurotic and paranoid times as well. My nephew turned out to be a quieter boy too. He's insightful and calm for most of the time unless he's playing with my parents. (Then he morphs into a crazed child haha.)

Osmosis of emotions and behaviours and mannerisms?

Hmm, when I have a child of my own in the future, I wonder what traits my child will pick up from me and K? I hope only the good ones haha.

Granny

Granny was doing very good yesterday when I went to see her. She was very alert and mighty observant. She talked alot voluntarily. She wasn't grumpy and could make jokes to tease me. Her eyes looked bright and not glazed. She was looking at anything and everything around her.

She even saw that a button on my Dad's shirt was loose and needed more stitching to hold it in place. I didn't even notice it haha.And she finished the big bowl of puree they gave her for lunch yesterday. She finished every spoonful I fed her! :)

Am so so glad and happy that she's back to her normal self after the last month or so of not feeling well.

哪里可以这样?

How can someone just float his way through work and get away with it? Siam this, siam that. Do a little here, a little there. Talk his way in and out of things. Don't deliver. Create big messes. Put the blame on others.

And YET, still manage to survive for so long in this organisation??!!

I don't understand.

The more I think about it, the more I fume and the more I don't like this person and try not to have anything to do with him.

It's not healthy. Maybe I shouldn't bother too much.
But I guess the unfairness I feel at times gets the better of me.

Rambling

A project idea was “sold” to the boss and painted in a pretty, rosy, cloudy picture. A picture which hid all the flaws, cracks and inconsistencies of the project. You were roped in at the beginning to help the project proposer do up some initial work to bid for the project. That person skived and you ended up doing the work. The boss knew what was going on and when the project was finally awarded to your company, the boss decided to pass the project on to you. That was 2 years ago.

2 years on. Sure, you learn some things and it builds you up. Hopefully your character, intelligence and acumen builds up as well.

And you’re still stuck with a non-viable screwed-up project. Maximum effort and minimum returns for the company. Brand exposure for the company is good, but not when it dents your bank balance so much. When the project concludes and the funds outflow is more than what was meant to be? Whose head will be on the chopping block? The project manager or the boss? The initial project proposer has long before wiped his hands clean of things. Bollocks.

There’s still slightly more than 6 more months to go. Things are heating up as the project approaches its climax. There are more and more people to answer to. Your bosses. External stakeholders. Vendors who are trying to play with you.

You’re feeling more frustrated now and at a loss. Trapped in a cage. With bright lights shining on you from all sides of the cage. You can’t seem to do anything but just stare blindly into the lights with wide-eyed terror and confusion. Fight or flight? Or freeze?

Fight? Clawing through. No arrow to follow, just scrambling in a wayward direction, hoping it’s for the best.

Yes, hope. That’s all you have now. And your claws, or what’s left of them.

The Is and the Es

I recently attended a one-day course on Communications and Stakeholder Management.

It was a relatively enjoyable course and highly unusual for me because I felt at ease with myself and could present in front of the whole class without much nervousness. My goofy side even managed to show itself on several occassions with some impromptu jokes to the whole class.

The guest lecturer was Dr John Ng who has written several books and gotten them published in Singapore. There was a section when Dr Ng shared with us the differences between introverts and extroverts.

The main difference is how and where the two groups of people draw their energy from. Introverts get their energy from themselves and when they need time to recharge, they need to be with themselves, either at home or perhaps just being by themselves in a cafe outside. Or maybe just with a like-minded friend. Extroverts on the other hand, draw their energy from the environment and from things and people around them. When they need to recharge, they are up, out and about, immersing themselves amongst others and getting their energy from the bustle around them.

In terms of thinking, introverts tend to spend more time thinking and delving into things at a deeper level. They analyse more and reflect more on things. Extroverts on the other hand, do less of all these things. Introverts find it harder to respond on the cuff because they need time to analyse and think through, extroverts don't.

Looking at some other examples he shared with the class, I think as I grow older, I get more introverted. Too much noise, hustle and bustle tire me out fast. A walk in Orchard is tiring too and I can only last an hour plus or two before the noise, people and jumble of things get to me. Most days I prefer just hanging and chilling out at home or in quiet places, either alone, with K or with a small cosy group of friends.

So what are you? An I or an E? :)

Second Childhood

There is this concept of a "second childhood" and the common explanation is that it refers to a phase experienced by the aged who suffer from severe dementia and whose mental faculties and emotional control have been reduced to that akin to a child's.

Looking after granny has given me a new perspective to this term. She can be considered relatively alert and at times even witty for her age. Although I admit she does have her down days when she spouts nonsense. But still to me, technically, her mind's still okay on the whole.

So "second childhood" in her case refers more to her physical state. She wears diapers and most recently, she isn't really able to chew food properly so she now gets pureed food and soup for her meals.She needs help going to the bathroom and she needs lots of support when getting on and off the bed. She moves around these days entirely on wheelchair compared to a few months back when she could still summon some strength to use her walking frame.

Whatever it is, I am very thankful that her mental state of mind is still relatively alright. in fact, quite good for her age. And I am very thankful that although she doesn't want to talk much these days, she still called out my name when I asked her if she knew who I was.