finally blogger is accessible..

2 farewell dinners within this week alone..

Thursday was with the duckie gals...our dear whacko Lydia is leaving us for a 2-yr stint in Jakarta....
Teaching the A-level curriculum English to the graduating batch classes of an international school there...

Quite a good package...staying in a condo which is barely 2 yrs old....
A chauffer to fetch her around...aw man...

And then there's Dan...
Steamboat dinner for him at his place tomorrow night...with the rest of the uni gang...
Leaving us in Jan to further his studies in Sydney for about a year...

Sighzz...my close friends...
Do take care whilst there...will definitely miss you guys...

===========
It's almost the end of 2006...
If 2005 came and went by fast..
Then 2006 zipped by precariously fast...

If 2005 was a year of many ups & downs...
Then 2006 was even more of a rollercoaster ride haha...

Havent been able to do a proper review of the year's activities...
Achieved some goals..partially achieved some...& fell flat on some as well..

Time to reflect? Time to plan for next year?

Tentative theme....
Re-charge, Re-motivate, Re-juvenate, Re-energise

Been in too much of a slowmoving slacker position...
Guess I need some change..
I need some more action..

Is BKK possible in January?
Maybe...Hope so...

===========
Our 1000th day is arriving...
In less than 2 months time...

boxing day...

I is grumpy.
I is drowsy.
I is cold.
I is sick.

Got up this morning and struggled a bit.
To go to work or not?
Ok, conclusion = NO!!!

Reason #1
I is sick. Throat hurts. Nose blocked. Cough...
Bleah..

Reason #2
Who the fish goes to work in such heavy rain?

========
Did some work, including my Performance appraisal..is this considered work too?
Oh well..cut & pasted alot of last year's stuff into the appraisal.

Seriously cannot be bothered to do too much with it. Waste of time.
Does it help to ask the same questions year after year??

What are your career goals?
Describe your strength & areas for improvement.
Rate yourself from 1 to 5 on the following attributes...(and yeah, there's like 31 rating questions altogether...)

Waste of time. Period.

========
Not bad. Managed to do some work even though my brain's half fried from the medication.
Flu pill + cough mixture = POWER....
Think I'm on a high now...halloooocinating....
oh wait...halloooseenating....
halloooseenayyyting...
hallucinating...

========
Busy week ahead...gatherings..
More food & booze maybe...bringing voddy to Dan's place on Saturday..

========
Hmm mm..hope mama choy, big sis & 2nd sis like the craft pieces I made for them...

Hope papa choy can be patient...din get him anything...nor make anything..for this xmas..
But his expensive pressie will be coming soon..
Akan datang...
Chivas Regal 18 years...coming soon in mid Jan...when Adrian comes back from his Vegas trips...

hiakzz..

========
The novice me...lost $30 in MJ yday...
Grrrrrrr.....
TMD...1st time in my life I had a chance to win a full colour....but it all fell to pieces cos the card I threw was what Eugene wanted...I was only waiting for 1 more card leh!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh well..what is mine is mine..what is not..is not bah....

I need other players...peter pan, purple skies, on???
hahaa..

=========
I am
talking nonsense

...
I am....zzzzzzzz

off to
bed........

friday...

As much as I'd like to be an epicurean..
Think I'm more comfortable being in the confines of austerity & simplicity..
Epicurity is reserved for the occassional indulgence to the soul...

Hmm..personal preference or a matter of being brought up this way..I dunno really.
Haha...just came to this conclusion somehow or rather..

I am on leave today..and I have spent my whole day at home.
Weird some might say..but wahey..it's a "take leave to rest" day..
Haha...as a matter of fact, it was thanks to a full bladder that I've just gotten out of bed
Would have slept on llike a log if my bladder did not send warning signals to my convoluted brain.

Adrian asked me. So sis, what did you do today?
Hmm mm...it really is just a short short list..
Had lunch, did some work, read my book, did art & craft, took a 3 hour nap, blog.
Which is where I am now.
So what comes later?

Perhaps to wrap my remaining 2 presents, to read somemore, and oh yah...to munch my dinner..
Bleah...not much of an appetite..

========
avoidance.
you're the boss.
so i shan't say much.

========
ok, off to cook maggi mee...
been a long time since i had maggi mee..woot woot!

more senseless stuff

Met up with Eddie yesterday for lunch..

My dear buddy..what a sticky, interesting situation you have gotten yourself into..
You ah...sighzz..

Told you my piece..shared with you my concerns..
Shared with you my thoughts..

But ultimately, it's your life and your choices which matters...
All the best & keep me updated... haaa...

========
Dropped note to XiaoDi on friendster and he replied! haha...
Been a long time since I last communicated with him..

Haha, nice to hear from him.... =)

========
I surprised myself this year.
It has been quite awhile since I wrote so many Xmas cards...

Think I only gave out like less than 5 last year?
I wrote out more than 15 this year...

Madness..ahha..

Xmas is still my fav time of the year..but the cosy feeling I get whenever Xmas draws near is diminishing year by year...

Aw man...Is this a sign of aging?
I think so leh....*horrors*

=======
Should be heading to Cannery next Friday....
Anybody keen?

=======
2 years..cun wait for the keys to arrive...
Haha..=p

senseless stuff...

Now i know why i've been feeling so down and out..
Tired and grouchy..
hahaa...miserable day yesterday..din feel good..
And by the time evening came..I was sprawled on the table while waiting for ahboy to meet me at Hans.

Struggled through dinner..couldn't eat much..
Caught a cab home and then discovered I was running a slight temperature...
Popped 2 panadols, concussed at 930pm and slept like a log through till 7am this morning..

Fever's gone but the sore throat is still there...bleah..
Mind over body...

Think I will be concussing soon again...
Not back to 100% yet...

========
It's gonna be a busy busy 2.5 weeks ahead...with the festive season gatherings, birthdays & a wedding...

========
The anagram's a tough one eh? ahaha...

Gotten some tentative ones from the Lemon...but all dun make sense!!! hahaha...
What the hell is Cheem "n" Gills?
haha...a...

Cherry...help me out!!

========
What do you do when you think one of your bosses is a dick head?
Oh my pardon my lang. But it gets the point across, you have to admit...

But then again, I'm just a small fry getting my monthly pay....
Not worth it to get worked up about stuff....

========
On leave liao loh!! woot woot!
Hmm mm..might be on "MC" next week..hmm mm...

========
Goodbye 9522...
Mazda 3 Carbon Grey is here!!

Virgin trip in the Grey today...not bad..not bad at all...
But guzzles oil like xiao...

edge of a precipice

ouch.

cun believe i spent $60 over 3 occasions.
just buying beads & metal connectors & crystals.

oh well. to feed a new found hobby.
to feed my itchy fingers which need something tangible to do.

=======
wealth accumulation.
what a term to use.

But it sounds pretty fetching ain't it?

give me a choice and yes, i do want to accumulate wealth too.

the choice has not presented itself to me yet though. or do i need to go out to find it?
passive? proactive? which is me?

=======
it is odd. the forehead seems a little tender and sore.

since yesterday or was it two days ago?

the right side seems more so.

i cannot help but be paranoid. whenever something unusual happens to the head area.
or to anything connected to the head.

=======
it seems odd too.

that a colleague from my team texted me this afternoon.
"get online. i need to talk to you."

shoot. have i done anything wrong? did i offend this person?

and so online i went. with slight trepidation.

and became a partial listening ear to one who needed to vent a little about the job and our boss.

"i will not be here for long. i will quit soon" she said.

wow. so forthright i thought. and we are not even that close.

do i have an honest face or demeanour? why are people telling me such things?
do i seem to be a keeper of secrets? it is hard to remain objective and neutral for long.

but i will try.

=======
oh blimey. i have a slight rash again.

=======
ch is a joy to be with sometimes. neverending bubbliness.
is there such a word?
ever cheerful. once of the few who's able to smile even when she's pissed off.

brother is the other.
come to think of it. sharon too.

am i the only monkey in the company who's a grouchy one?

=======
ugh. rash is irritating me.
i will go bathe again. and loofah my skin off maybe.

need hot water to soothe frazzled nerves.

sit down. be still.

extremely frustrating day.

on way to work. at bus-stop. pants all wet. shoes all wet. bedraggled doll.

at work. what's new?

lunchtime. botak jones. with san, kok, lian. disappointing and unsatisfactory. 4 plates of leftovers.

back to work. nothing new. more irritations.

afternoon. stomach spoil. feel like barfing.

just before going home. fuck still heavy rain. dinner with ahboy is cancelled.

on way home. dumb 16 yr-old teenagers acting as chimpanzees in the train.

reach interchange. brainless people who flick their wet brollies at hapless passers-by.

reach bus stop. extremely long queue. could not get up the 1st bus.

just before home. stepped into a puddle of water. TMD.

reach home. slammed door onto finger.

lonely dinner. with PC as companion.

now. still sitting in front of PC. cold fingers. cold toes. miserable and irritable.

tummy partially satisfied. self-made spaghetti and sausages.

hmph. frown. pout. fucking frustrating day.

December 18th

31 months.
& counting.

*evil laughter*

muaaha....
muahahah..
muahhahaaa....

Another convert to Il Divo...
My brother..=))
Borrowed all their albums from me just now..

=======
When will the day come?
When little Marc Sng actually marches up to me and says: "Ah Gor, play with me!!"
(He does this to his grandad all the time..)

Little brat walked right past me just now..
When I asked him if I could play with him..
Sighzz...
I have lost my charm.

=======
Am reading a book now..
Called "Midwinter of the Spirit" by Phil Rickman.

Sinister...About exorcism..or "deliverance" as a more diplomatic term to peruse..

Hope I don't think too much and get nightmares like how some of the previous books were... hahha

=======
I actually received a Xmas card from a primary school mate..

Gosh, I am S-U-R-P-R-I-S-E-D....

Do people really send physical greeting cards to friends nowadays?

Wow..

monday..the blues..(and no, am not talking about chelsea)

the rain..just puts a damper on things..

======
the indigo of hurt
the ochre of sadness
the magenta of mystery

To add a new one
The bronze of frustration

======
Kok sent me home today..kinda sweet..
Knew I was moody...offered me a ride home..though it was way out of range from his hometown haha..

Steady uncle..

Going Botak Jones tomorrow with him, Ah San & Lian..=)

======
Suddenly realised I miss Hammie.. (in the pic)
And Baby..

My 2 little darlings...







======
I find myself scary when I get down in the doldrums..
Cos it's seldom that it's so intense...(with the exception of last year when I was on medication..)
And I hate the fact that I feel like crying every moment.

Blast it..

I'm not exaggerating when I say I teared when I watched the Channel 8 drama when Li Nanxing sang a birthday song to Zoe Tay. What was a comical scene turned out to be very touching to me. Aw man....some tears came when I was watching abit of CrimeWatch showing
Huang Na's case.

What shit?
I'm nuts...

Bleah, and I have to bear through with it..for at least a few days till it goes away...
And all goes back to normal again..

=======
New lady came today..new member to the Mktg team
Cheryl

Let's see...let's see
If she's a friend or ...

my sunday

Gosh. Been huddled over my desk for most part of the day..
Fiddling with my art & craft...
Il Divo playing in the background.
It's weirdly therapeutic..

Brows furrowed over the tiny crystal pieces...
Fingers getting slightly numb..
Neck aching..
Burnt my finger too cos I was trying to seal the ends of a nylon string together with a lighter..

But it feels good, when you've completed a few pieces of it...

A rainy day..took a nap in the afternoon..
Who can resist the lull of the raindrops?

Ended up concussing for slightly more than 2 hours..
Woke up still as grouchy as in the morn. Guess the sleep didn't do much to soothe the soul..

Night time comes.
And still the rain persists..even more so with thunder and lightning..
I cannot quite seem to clear my head of thoughts..

And so I head back to my craft...fingers really kinda numb..
So decided to pop online..and surf aimlessly...

Tomorrow's a working day..Xian.

hopes & fears..wishes & dreams..do you know?

I have learnt not to hope or expect too much.
Cos the more you hope, the harder you fall if you don't get what you wished for..
And that's why sometimes I choose to hide in my own little corner..with my own thoughts, unspoken wishes & fears..

Oh...the pessimistic, paranoid side of me...
Someone, save me from the shackles of it....

=======
Moping .
On a rainy Sunday.
With Il Divo playing in the background..
Man, the tears have arrived again..been awhile..

raindrops galore

Am on a mini quest, to form an anagram from my name.
Michelle Sng

Quite a number of singular words can be formed..But when I try to use up all letters..
I can't seem to form anything much...

Bleah..opening up to the rest...any takers to the challenge? haha...
Lemon, you are in on this yah. Mr Power-English.
Cherry, you too...=)) Ms Power-English.

==========
Was at Creation yesterday..
Their business is doing good good good...
Hired more staff, more tables, newer menu...
Longer queues..

Wonder if they'll eat up the business next door as well...
Hmm mm...

Did not manage to finish the brownie yesterday though..
Wasted...was too full..

==========
I have added 2 more converts to the Il Divo club..
muahhaaa..

Mum & Dad...

Got a plesant surprise when she was asking for me to play the "Italian Opera CD"...
haha...

new hobby

hiakzz....back to one of my loves..
art & craft...
bought lotsa swarovski crystals...gonna make keychains & handphone chains....

yay!! fun fun fun!
=))

but tmd...din know such crystals are quite expensive actually...

barf time

I broke the promise i made to myself 3 years ago.

What happened then...
Was with the DK group..company outing to Europa..
Went home and hugged the toilet bowl retching..
Told myself then that I would never do that to myself again.

And I did it again last night.
TMD.
Hugged the same damn bowl and retched in the same darn position.
Sigh..it's a balance..a few hours of happy reprieve and wild abandon..
Followed by some sort of a payback..

So today..is a stomach spoil day...
Bleah..

=========
St James Power Station...

Think I prefer MOS..

am sad..

am abit sad..
you try...but sometimes trying just aint good enough.
somehow..a friend still chooses to go to another..

am abit sad..
you try..but sometimes trying just ain't good enough.
somehow..the project you are doing, still fails to pull through..

am abit sad..
you try..but sometimes trying just ain't good enough.
somehow..the more you try..the more conscious you become..

am abit sad..
you try..but sometimes..it just ain't happening.

colourisation

the red of passion
the green of hope
the pink of health
the indigo of sadness
the ochre of naturality
the black of nights
the cream of days
the magenta of mystery
the blue of calm
the emerald of peace
the purple of hurt
the yellow of happiness
the cyan of ecstasy
the orange of fun
the sepia of memories
the fuchsia of madness

what was i before you?
a canvas sheet
a tarpaulin
a piece of cloth

you have coloured my life so much
a tapestry of sorts i am now

Morose Recluse

Retreating into my shell
This is happening more and more

Withdraw and hide
Tucked into the confines of your own safe haven
Seems like a comforting place to be in

=========
Uh-oh..
The slapping feeling is here again.

Stepped into office this morning and I feel like slapping people again.
And of course, I stepped in late as usual. 915 I think.

Yikes. Can I find a place soon who will have me?

people to people

I don't know why.
But I take it very hard & I get very disheartened & sometimes pissed...
When I see how 2-faced some people are, whether they may or may not realise it.

I know this is not a new topic I have written about.
But the fact of the matter is, this is something which always gets me riled up.

Come on.
When she's not around, you bitch about her to others, you talk bad about her & you laugh at her.
Then when she's back, you talk to her, joke with her & ask her for opinions?
Hmm mm..makes me wonder, sometimes out loud, what the fiak?

And some of the remarks you make, seem funny to you only.
Wonder if you noticed?

And to those who wonder...
No, I am not talking about the whore.

========
At times, I'd rather hide out in my own cubicle..
Ad be in my own little private world...
Sure I'd miss out on some gossips or some bonding with others..
But well, if it keeps me out of the hypocrisy of things...why not...

Of fakeness & facades..

Ok, maybe I am not such a PR person.
I cannot be bothered anymore to initiate conversations with people...
More and more, I seldom make the first move & I seldom interact with people unless neccesary.

Man, I sound like a recluse wanna-be.

=======
Have I mentioned before that I cannot stand squealers?
Oh yes I did I think.

I cannot stand peeps who squeal.
Especially those who squeal over the slightest thing.

Ok, I can stand them when they dun squeal. But when they do.
Please, spare me the agony.

Is there a need to S-Q-U-E-A-L over the littlest of things??
Is there a need to get so over-excited over some trivial thing??
Sheesh........

=======
Ok, on top of being a recluse wanna-be...

I think I am starting to sound like an uptight spinster liao....

Bleah......!

a few good things & a WHAMMY!

A few good things:

1. Official Zo Bo Day: Got called into an absolutely redundant meeting from 215-545pm..did more MSN-ing and my own work than listen to the meeting.
2. I think it's starting to sink in..am feeling happy about the Monday deal..
3. I got another dress! black one this time..
4. I got my pasta sauce! Tmr will be pasta for dinner!
5. I got a whole box of salad ingredients!
6. 2 more days to Saturday!


And a WHAMMY....

I forgot to buy my unit number...for today's draw....
And the number came out...in starter.........bleah......
@#%$*&)(*)%^*&

Mum & Adrian got it...
$%$&
Adrian offered to help me buy yesterday but I declined somemore, saying that I will settle myself...DUMB!!!!!

On a positive note...hiakzz....nvm lah..at least me & ahboy have brought joy to others lor haha..
And well..this is a good start...our number has struck lottery & in such quick time somemore...
It's a good sign... haha...

money money money

I just emptied a large portion of my savings today.

Grass for my meals in the next few months?
Bleah...

Bonus...pls come quick..18th Dec...2 weeks more only...
I NEED YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

=======
Kinda exciting...lotsa turning points in my life over the past 2 years..
Health, relationship...friends...family...

Lots more to come next year too.
Am looking forward to French..a nice way to start the new year...
A nice way to usher in new hopes & dreams...
2007..I'm ready for you man!

=======
Shit...French just burnt another hole in my pocket...
$335 for 8 lessons. Everything in. Text, course fee, GST, registration fee.
WTF. $40 for each 3 hour lesson??

bleah....

It's a done deal

4th Dec 2006.
It's a done done done deal.

Brother Longan, you might be happy to know that your basketball kaki...
Will be staying in Tampines in the near future...
5 minutes from your place..
Hahahhaa....

========
Damn..purse strings must be watched even tighter...

the other me

I stand outside the bubble looking in.
Looking in at the other me inside the bubble.

The other me holds a ciggy.
Puffing away. Puffing away whatever bad thoughts, stresses, unhappiness there might be.
The other me stands alone, leaning against a railing, overlooking a river.
It seemed familiar, the place...esplanade? one fullerton? collyer quay? boat quay? clarke quay?

The other me looks a tad older & wiser.
Signs of whatever has gone on through the years is written on the face, only slightly though.
More weather-beaten but surprisingly, more well-toned & womanly.
The other me wears a smart, well-tailored blue striped shirt and a black skirt ending just above the knees. Covered heels.
The image screams 'Corporate'.

The other me still has long hair.
More layered & dyed a dark brown with a few lighter shades of brown streaked through.

The other me stares out to the river.
It is night-time and she looks a little dreamy and pre-occupied, staring at the lights reflected on the water surface.
The ciggy dies out and the other me throws it into the river below.
She stays there against the railings for a long time. Hugging her arms around herself.

I stand outside the bubble looking in. I think to myself.
What is she thinking about? Why is she there?
Has she taken her dinner? How is her life now?
How old is this other me?
Who/What is in her life now? Why isn't she carrying a bag?
Is she going back to office to do OT?
Or is someone else waiting for her at a dinner table elsewhere?

=====
Tis a dream I had last night.
A snippet into my future?
Or my over-imaginative mind just fabricating a scene..?

....

There's a difference between Mr/Miss Know-It-All.
And Mr/Miss Think-They-Know-It-All.

Both irritates me to some aspect..
But the latter irritates me most..

========
As a true friend..would you want to:

- tell someone what you think they want to hear? or...
- tell them the truth? even if it hurts bad?

tmr's friday!

WHEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

18th Jan 2007.
D-Day when I get to see my 4 pseudo lovers in the flesh...
And when I get to hear Sebby live...*hoots*

Went to Sistic just now to get Il Divo tix..
And yeah, am watching it ALONE...realised it's on a Thursday at 8pm...Ahboy can't make it..
He offered to take half day..but nah...
Didn't want him to waste his leave on such a concert afterwhich he'll probably strangle me when it ends...
And well..didn't think any other peeps might appreciate them..so didn't bother trying to jio others...
Yeah, guess I'm a loner in some ways...

Hope to be able to sneak in a camera...
Will I be cuffed if I run backstage? Hmm mm...hehe..

==========
Prolly heading to the doc tomorrow morn.

The 2 rash areas on both my thighs aren't getting better...
And they were itching like crazy when i was lunching with XP, Kok & San this afternoon....

It's kinda weird...everyone's getting rashes..boss, kok, diana, wilson...bleah............
Hope it's the air in office...hope the doc gives me 5 days MC so I can stay away from office... (yeah..fat hope)...

==========
Speaking of lunch..

The buffet lunch at Siam Kitchen in Bugis Junction really filled me up...
To the BRIM.

Couldn't walk properly after that cos I was trying to suck my tummy in...
Whilst trying to maintain a good posture...
And trying to maintain a straight face.. haha..

==========
I hate to be a spoilsport...
But shit but I ain't the least excited about the company D&D.

And try as I might to muster up abit of interest...But...
Nah, decided to be true to my heart...

I still ain't the least bit interested...
Hiakzz..

==========
I hate squealers.
I hate gigglers.
I hate act-cuters.
I hate naggers.
I hate over-exciters.

I love suave-ers.
I love diplomatic-ers.
I love smart-ers.
I love quick-witters.
I love quiet-ers.

==========
Was with Marc that day...
Said he wanted to get turtles...
And he wanted 3!

Asked him what would he name them.
Gi Gi, Go Go, & Ga Ga!!
He screamed happily...

Aw man..the innocence of youth...hhaah
Damn cute...

==========
Heading Sentosa again with Dan, Kym, XL & Von..
Time for more frisbee..
Time for more nuahing..
Time for more bonding..
hhaa...

my 4 lovely gentlemen..

Was at Gramophone.

Asked for Il Divo's 3rd album and the girl looked at me like I was spouting rubbish.
Told me there's no 3rd album. They only have 2 albums and a Xmas CD.

Told her there was a 3rd album and it's called Siempre.

Insisted there wasn't.

Told her there really was!

Insisted there wasn't!

Ok, so I gave up.

TMD.
#^%^*&(^%

She doesn't know her stuff

$#&%^(*&$

The album was released in SG on 27th Nov!!!!!

=============
OMFG!!

They are really coming to SG...Hiakz!!!

18th Jan is D-Day!!
Gonna get either the $118 or $148 categories...

Wonder if I can psycho ahboy to go...hmm mm...
Prolly have to pay for his tix if so..hmm mm..

Anyway!! I'll get to see them!

Voddy...

I have succumbed to Voddy....

I have finally opened that bottle of vodka sitting in my cupboard...
And finished about a third of it liaozz...aw man.. haha..
Was feeling bored on Friday...bored, moody and more than a little listless...

Little Vodka was calling out to me from the cupboard....
Opened the door...and there she was..waving her hands at me...

For a year I managed to withstand her advances...but well...I finally gave in...
And well..had vodka cranberry for the rest of the night haha...
Couldn't find any soft drinks in my kitchen..so made do with cranberry juice...

=p
I miss having that little bit of alcohol in the system...Been quite awhile..
Hope this Friday's K-session will materialise...

*beep beep*

*beep beep* went my phone..at 630pm..

It was Lemon.
"Hey, Il Divo is gonna be on Channle 14 in a few minuites time."

Woohoo!!!!
Plonked myself in fron tof the TV and waited...And in a few minutes time..
There they were...looking glorius and suave on Larry King Live...
Throaty voices...engaging smiles..aw man...I was glued to the screen..

And then they performed...and I melted...yet again..haha...

Mentioned that they would be doing their Asian tour next year...
Hope they'll pop by SG...*crosses fingers*

Think I'll name my future son Sebastien...Maybe with Carlos as a middle name..
Hmm mm..Sebastien Carlos... hahaha....

Ok, I am officially infatuated..with 4 guys...
hiak hiak...

thoughts

Date: Sunday 26th November.
Time: :30pm
Location: Sitting in my room.
Weather: Dark cloudy skies.

I am thinking of:

1) A trip to either Bali or Hong Kong or Bangkok in Q1 next year...
Pity that a large part of Chatuchak was burnt down a few weeks ago. Wonder if things will be okay in 4-5 months time? HK..been 3 years since I was there..wanna go back for a 2nd visit..this time round with ahboy..
Bali..hmm mm..I wanna get a tan! and so many peeps have been saying what a nice place it is..

2) Cutting my hair next week. Maybe on Tuesday?
Getting long and bushy again..Rebond has worn out already...am having inner curls already, which adds to the bushy-ness...

3) Damn, I can't go for a run today..looks like it's gonna rain any moment now. Perhaps tomorrow night.

4) Sighzz. Xmas season again. On the one hand, it's my fav festivity of the year. On the other hand, there's the headache of giving gifts..wondering & thinking of what exactly to get for various people.

5) Feeling sleepy again. Shit, and I just got up at 11am!

6) I think chances are slim for the Premiere. Alternatives: Kallang? Bishan?? hmm mm..both areas don't seem very appealing to me..

7) I need to trim both sets of nails..too long for comfort..

8) Wondering when will my concentration be long enough to pursue an interest for a worthwhile period of time? Malay was half done. Just started on yoga & I suspect that will be forsaken after awhile. French is akan datang..and I hope I can follow-through with it.
Grrr...hate my hot-cold interests...

9) Kinda like the atmosphere in office now. Not so many people around. Quieter, less buzz...easier to do work. Though the irritability of work has not subsided. Haha...had a good session with the boss on Friday afternoon. Gave me a compliment. And somehow I felt like a little girl again...happy to receive a little compliment..eager to please...
Aw man.. haha...just a few days ago, I felt ready to strangle her..

10) Staccato shell at work again..disjointed thoughts...so many thoughts...all totally unrelated...
Think i will go watch some DVDs now..and then after that...go read through my diary for some of my past entries..

Hope

Every page will be flipped.
Every book will be read.
Every chorus will be hummed.
Every song will be sung.

Every stream will bubble.
Every river will flow.
Every sapling will grow.
Every tree will take root.

Of love, life, wishes.
Pain, anger, hurt, disappointment.
Laughter, happiness, peace, joy.

To live.
To learn.
To love.

Everytime I look At You - Il Divo

I used to think that I was strong
I realise no I was wrong
Cause everytime I see your face
My mind becomes an empty space
And with you lying next to me
Feels like I can hardly breathe

I close my eyes
The moment I surrender to you
Let love be blind
Innocent and tenderly true
So lead me through tonight
But please turn out the light
Cause I'm lost everytime I look at you

And in the morning when I look at you
Wake me gently so I'll know
That loving you was not a dream
And whisper softly what it means to be with me
Then every moment we're apart
Will be a lifetime in my heart

I close my eyes
The moment I surrender to you
Let love be blind
Innocent and tenderly true
So lead me through tonight
But please turn out the light
Cause I'm lost everytime I look at you

Kaozzz....

Stepped into office at 11am after the medical appointment.
Logged on, cleared some emails. Packed some collaterals for someone to collect.
And then voila. Boss sends an SMS at 1150pm.

"Michelle, we have a lunch appointment with Andrew at 1230pm."

Hello???? Now then you tell me.....abit late right???

Boss comes back at 12pm..discusses something with her. With regards to the lunch appointment. And then 1225...zoom we're off for the appointment.

Comes back at 150pm. Boss says:

"Oh yah, there's a LOVE meeting at 2pm"

What the???? Now then you tell me AGAIN???????!!!!!!!!!
I give her a look. *whiney voice* Do I really need to go?

"It will be good you to go lah..."

And so off I go again. Only when I arrived then I realised. This is not a meeting at all lor!!!! It's a mini training session!!!
The session was till 420pm. 2 torturous hours of sitting in a classroom setting..

After that, trudged my way back to my office.
Reached my desk and sat down for not more than 5 mins. Li Li comes over and says:

"Hey, you joining us right? Now got briefing."

Har??? There's a briefing, I'm supposed to be involved and I didn't even know?? I'm supposed to be involved and nobody informed me? What the hell???

And off I go again. Till 530pm I think. And that was the time when I finally had the time to sit down and warm my seat properly.
Spent the whole friggin day...in meetings, briefings & what not. All of which I was supposed to be involved in. But nobody informed me till the last minute.

Once or twice is okay lah. Not all the time mah....
What the....
*fumes*

Ok, nvm..looking forward to Thursday where there's a carpark beer date again.
A resurrection of a buried tradition.
Haha..not really a tradition too...more like a bonding session of sorts.

Thursday...yeah...put time put place liao. =)
Wonder who else is coming though...
Old members for sure. Me, kok & san. New members?
Hmm mm...

monday bluesss

Oh my..we received the notification form..
We in the list...for The Premier..

Though we're number 720. And there's only 616 units for sale.
There're taking in applications up to twice the number of units avilable..
Just cos of the possibility that there might be people of Q number 1 - 616...who might not want the flat afterall...

So well..we're number 720...we'll see how it goes...
4th Dec is the day we have to go for selection of unit..that is, provided there are still any units left...330pm
Else, back to square one..i.e. nothing...

===========
Haha..find it kinda funny..
Yong Siang is popping by the office tomorrow...

We're gonna have a wine-tasting session... =p
To select our company's year-end gift for our corporate clients...

Thanks to Guin, I now have the proper excuse to drink whilst at work...MUAHAHAHA....

===========
Appointment with JT today. Waited for 30 minutes..
Went into his office and I was out of it in 3 minutes flat.
And the verdict is...I'll next see him in a year's time..i.e. November 2007.

Him : How are you? How's things? All ok? All normal? Hair's all ok?
Me : Uh huh..all normal..yup, hair's all ok..growing out.
Him : Good! *beams at me*
Me : *continues* Cept for the occassional headaches..and there was once my head hurt the whole day from morn till the next morn.
Him : Hmm...*continues scribbling on his notepad* *raises his brows and gives a shrug*

Me : *Looks at him* I don't have to do a re-scan of my head? It's been a year
Him : Nah..no need. I scan, it only shows that yes, you've done an op before. That's it. It won't show anything else.
Me : Errr..ok.

Him : Ok, that's good, so all's fine. Occassional headaches are fine. Just as long as they are not recurring or daily. Ok, so I'll see you next year then. You take care.
Me : Oh ok...thanks.
Him : *sticks a note into my patient file* Bye! You take care!

I am S-T-R-E-T-C-H-E-D

And I mean literally...
Went for 2 yoga sessions this week...One on Thurs night & one on Saturday afternoon...
Saturday's session was a killer...haha, was complaining that the poses/postures were inhuman poses.
But I have to admit, the instructor on Saturday was good..think I'll go on Saturdays from now on...skip the Thursday one..

Am aching all over now...especially my shoulders and upper back..aw man...

=========
French enrolment is starting soon..eagerly anticipating...
Come January..and I'll be a pseudo student.. haha..
Aiming for the once a week Saturday class...maybe from 2pm to 5pm..

Yoga will have to switch to a weekday then...or Sunday morning... hmm mm...

=========
It is always a bit sad..when someone takes credit for your work done...ain't it?
No matter how small the effort was..it still hurts when someone else takes the credit...right?
It still stings when you hear your boss commending someone else, for your idea..yeah?

Sighzz..such is life issit?...
Ain't no word as F-A-I-R....
Shit happens...

=========
I am abit freaked.
Had a headache the whole of last Saturday...and a throbbing headache the whole of last night too...concentrated in a spot just behind my right eye...and spreading out to my temple..
Am not sure if I was being paranoid or over-sensitive...but I thought my right temple was slightly swollen yesterday...

What's more it's the right side...
Everyday when I wash my face..I can feel the screw there...

Tomorrow morn's my appointment with JT..been half a year since I last saw him...
Have not gone through a re-scan for a year...wonder if I need to do any tomorrow..?
Just hope all is well...

bad week

Been a bad week, mostly in terms of work...

I need to learn to let go..yeah..or maybe take things with a lighter heart..
Been pissed nearly every day over the past work week..
Friday, was the culmination of the week..
Was supposed to be on half day and cos something cropped up, couldn't leave till 3-plus 4pm...

Fuming..fuming..

Ahboy is right...I should learn to take things easy..
Afterall, a job is just a job and only just a job...

Been a long time since the floodgates poured forth..
It just happened involuntarily on one of the weeknights..though for only a short time..
Still, I felt good after that...a perverse way of release I suppose...

To You, From Me

Will you be with me?
For every tomorrow that I have?

il divo - Isabel

an intro to those who do not know them..From left to right: 1. Urs Buhler from Sweden 2. Carlos Marin of Spanish ancestry but born & bred in Germany 3. French guy Sebastien Izambard 4. American David Miller....

il divo - Passerà

lovely lovely lovely..*swoon swoon swoon* if only one of them would sing to me..Urs Buhler, Carlos Marin, Sebastien Izambard & David Miller...when are you guys coming to SG???...

il divo

they're my heroes...gosh I love them..been listening to their Ancora album non-stop again..re-discovered it..after I got it about half a year back..nice album to listen to when doing work, when wanting to chill, when wanting to vent..aw man...when anything!! watching alot of their vids on youtube now..*swoon*

Buttons!!!!!!!

Woot!
Just had today's dose of the Pussycat Dolls prancing about in their Buttons MTV..Think I played it like 3-4 times.. haha

Am going to sleep a satisfied girl... =)

The song just gets to me man...

I am Beat with a cap b.
nitey nite....

"Loosen up my buttons...babe..."
"Say what you gonna do to me...uh huh..."

my sweetie..

Had dinner with ahboy just now..and funnily...when I laid my eyes on him & saw him walking towards me...I could actually feel the bad, unhappy, sad thoughts flow out of me...
It was like as if we were on one of our 1st few dates...
Just seeing him made me happy...sort of like a sadness buster..

Watching him walk towards me with that silly grin and casual yet confident lope..aw man..still melts my heart..
That "excited-girl-meeting-her-prince-charming" kind of feeling... haa..
Wanted to just hug him on the spot and not let go...

Maybe not the 1st in my thoughts when I wake..
But definitely one of my last few thoughts when I sneak into Z-land..

Ok, getting a lil' mush-mush here...
My happy nut..love my baby...
Think I can go on and on...

Gush gush gush...
Changes again..some slight changes to our daily routines to accomodate his work schedule...

when is friday coming???

I am beat.

The past few days has been somehow tiring. It's not like as if I worked my ass off or I played too hard or anything. I just feel beat.
My eyes are perpetually semi-closed..I speak with a listlessness and well, I think I even eat with less zest...

Bleah..

=========
Cherry aka Purpleskies aka Bolster Girl aka..........commented that I always write in short sentences.

Yes I do, don't I? Dunno leh, told her that I feel constipated...Verbally and mentally constipated...
Perhaps that's why my thoughts are always jarred and in a mish-mash condition...
In a disarray..kinda like a staccato..short bursts here and there...seemingly disjointed..but hey maybe after awhile, they seem coherent too!
And that extrapolates into how I write..I can't seem to write in long, never-ending sentences.. haha..

I find it easier to read & comprehend in shorter droves & paragraphs...
Work effect maybe...Am constantly trying to use the least amount of text to convey a message.

==========
I hate it when one goes to you and starts letting off steam..
And then when I comment on something...
The steam turns around and blasts me instead...
Think sometimes. I'll just keep my mouth shut. Sure beats being blasted when the person is red hot and angry and can't get much sense into their heads...

Some people just shoot it off and don't care about anything.
Some play their cool...and try to contain their anger abit..
Others...well...simply bo chup...

Wonder which combi I am?