Reminders at Work

1. Stay calm – don’t show you’re stressed, being composed speaks mor
2. Stay friendly but keep personal life private – be approachable but not necessarily available to al
3. Support your immediate boss – keep them prepared & ready for their own boss. If/When they go up, they pull you up as well
4. Build relationships where they matter – not all who hold titles make or influence decisions
5. Stay out of gossip – listen but don’t be the source of it

clam....shell...

Attended a half-day course yesterday. All participants were ROs. Around 30 of us, with another 3-4 pax from the Workplace Development & HR teams who conducted and facilitated the session. 

Again I felt small & inadequate. Within the cluster group I was seated with, I could still speak a little & interact. I tried to siam all other presentations or impromptu speaking that needed to address the whole room. Was quite glad I managed to do so. 

Those who were cued could speak on the fly and articulate things so nicely. 

I'd clam up. 

:( 

底气

 爱人， 孩子， 家人， 好友

他们给的支持，依靠， 能量，爱和安全感

是我面对一切的底气

The Girls

N had a monumentally bad day last Friday. One of those days when anything & everything somehow didn’t go well. From some of her lessons sitting next to an annoying boy, to dance practice being very annoying, to her dance costume being very annoyingly ill-fitting and yada yada…

She reached home late around 6 or 615pm. Face was black and by the time she came upstairs & saw me, her mood was foul. Threw her stuff on the floor, started complaining to me, and then bawled big time. Sat on the floor and threw a tantrum, while still bawling.

Felt quite bad for her at the time. Offered a hug but was rejected. Ok so we’re at the age where hugs are “icky” unless initiated by her….Anyway, glad I managed to 误打误撞 that same night and managed to manually sew & alter her dance costume to fit her better. That helped ease her mind quite a fair bit.  

==========

It was A’s turn to have a bad bad day yesterday. She did not get into the Prefectorial Board Exco though she was initially shortlisted for a group interview. And…according to her, she was wrongfully scolded by her Science teacher for daydreaming in class. She said she was not doing that at all and felt very 委屈 about being called out & scolded in front of the whole class for something she did not do.

A classmate had also been borrowing items from her and “throwing” things back on her desk after using them. She’d been feeling fairly annoyed and upset with this classmate’s behaviour & interrruptions as well.

She was glum the entire evening right up till bedtime when she spent 15mins plus sharing her feelings with me.

I sat with her & listened. Also offered some potential solutions, which on hindsight I wondered if I should have given or not. Perhaps she only needed a listening ear.

AI - yah

And then there's this sudden pressure/push to adopt AI or use it in various ways in your work. 

Think about how it can improve or streamline your existing processes, etc. 

I am old school. I take long to learn new tech. 

And yes, while I am somewhat open, I am lazy, I am not savvy & I am a klutz at such stuff. 

AIyah.........

Sigh. 

Stress leh. 

FB post

Came across an FB post. Thought it was quite nice and real. 

Real strength isn’t found in throwing the hardest punch. It’s found in having the character to do what’s right when emotions are running high. Choosing courage over anger.

Parenting

I hope I am guiding the girls well enough in life. 

I wonder at times if I am too lax in certain areas or too strict in other areas.

I hope I equip them with enough knowledge and tips to handle their physical, emotional, mental changes as they transition from tweenhood to teenagehood, from primary school to secondary school, from being fully sheltered to now slowly exploring the world on their own.

A little bit more each day I see the babyness fading away. 

A little bit more each day I let go.

A little bit more each day I wonder how long more before they start rejecting my hugs or don't need them anymore. 

做个比较

Nag in office

Nag at home

 

Babysitter in office

Babysitter at home

 

后者是情愿的

前者是被情况所逼的

Fangirl

Attended a meeting yday which had reps from ministries, agencies & a tech giant. 

There were 2 very charismatic folks. One was a lady from a Ministry who was chairing/leading the meeting. The other was the APAC Director of Public Policy from the tech giant.

So so charismatic. So so intelligent. 

They spoke with grace, humility and clarity, with humour injected appropriately at various junctures to diffuse any tension there might have been in the room. They were extremely quick on their feet. They knew what they were saying, they knew what they wanted, they read the room, they led their positions well. They were intelligent, articulate and spoke with clarity. They were honest, reasonable, and respectful though they were on different sides of the table.

I was fangirling the entire time and I realized my boss was super impressed by the both of them as well lol. 

I was just an observer in the room, a fly on the wall if you may call it that way. Was quite floored by the exchanges in the meeting and definitely did not mind that the call overran by close to 45minutes from the original 1hr slot. 

It was an eye-opener for me and a learning experience. And also, a reminder to myself, of how much I am still lacking in. 

Conversations with the Tween & the Teenager

And so...the soon-to-be 13yr-old told me last night while fiddling with my jiggly flabby thighs & calves.

N: "Mama...so jiggly!! You want to try Taichi Walking? I saw the ads on YouTube."

Me: "You know those videos are AI-generated right?"

N: "Is it? Anyway, no harm giving it a try. But ok lah, jiggly is cute too." *continues giggling while shaking my flabby lower limbs"

And the soon-to-be 11yr-old followed up with:

A: "Mama is jiggly....Jigglypuff!! Mama can be jigglypuff! Pokemon jigglypuff is cute!"

救命啊....

Peri...no, not the sauce

Am I in perimenopause?

Dealing with bloatedness on a daily basis. Tummy has been getting bigger since last year. When menses comes, the bloating gets horrible and I easily look like I’m 4 months pregnant. Dresses are my go-to workwear on such days as they give me more space.

Dealing with dropping hair and a thinning patch on my crown as well. This brings me much worry… :(

Dealing with a lot more white hair this year too. Frizzy ones which either stick out or leave an obvious curly trail amongst the black strands. I'm not at the stage of colouring my hair yet though. Don't want to stress my scalp when I've other more concerning hair issues on hand. 

Dealing with slightly shorter menstrual durations.....

Dealing with.......aging in general........ugh. 

Frank

"Oh I thought I saw Auntie Diana just now! She looked quite 'auntie'."

So said the big one. 

"Really? I didn't see her. I'm also quite auntie."

Was my response.

"You're more auntie."

Ouch.  :( :( :(

有时候不用那么直接也是件好事 lol....

罢工

How do people do it?

Look after house, look after kids, look after work teams, look after parents and/or other family members…

Look after various aspects of self including skin, hair, food intake, teeth, eyes, body, mental/emotional aspects, overall health, etc

KNN sibei zuay stuff till I don’t want to do anything. 

罢工可以吗？老娘要躺平。

Hair

Found a balding spot at the top of my head a week plus or 2 weeks ago. Quite worried about it.

My hair is important to me. Unsure if there are other spots at the back of my head cos I can’t see.

☹☹☹☹☹

Bottle cap

Was at a staff EC's mother's wake yesterday afternoon. 

Another of my staff M was there. She's 59 with various health issues. When served with a bottle of water, I realised she could not twist open the bottle cap. She said she'd lost alot of strength in her arm/hands since a surgery 1-2 years ago to remove a tumour in her left lung. 

I know too that though she has on & off been on various physio sessions, she's not great on following up on the exercises on her own (despite her own son being a trainee physiotherapist). She's one who'd rather drink less water, at least when in office, so that she'll walk less to the washroom. 

Not being able to twist open a bottle of mineral water. Hmm. I resolve not to get into such a situation. Ever. 

Dance Mama

And...it was dance competition weekend again. 

Of false eyelashes & eyeliner. Of eyeshadow & lipstick. Of hairspray & gel. Of u-pins & netting.

Of getting her to the venue at least 1.5hrs before the performance time. And then playing the waiting game and hanging around till the performance time before going in to watch that <5mins of performance. 

But...if it's for her...

K & I & Mei Mei will do what we can to support her.

At a crossroads now. 

She likes it but it's taking up alot of time. 

Between schoolwork and dance, something's gotta give...even if not giving up totally but at least adjusted slightly....it will have to be dance that needs to be adjusted. School cannot be compromised. We're in Singapore. You're in the rat race the moment you're born. 

Will need to cut down on dance commitments for the next dance season. Either we skip it the competitions totally, or we just commit to 2 or 3 group dances hmm. 

C+

And so...laoniang was part of the statistics and kena Covid sometime in mid-May. 

I think my symptoms started sometime around 13 or 14 May but I did not think to medicate much since I didn't have any fever. I didn't swab myself till 17 May too...and it was only cos I chanced upon an expired test kit and decided to test myself using it. Since I was going to throw it away, might as well just erm...test haha. It turned out very positive....with 2 very deep, dark, red lines.

My jaw dropped and I tested again with a non-expired kit. Confirm positive zzz.

My 3rd time to get it. And I wonder why it is all in May....May 2023, May 2024 & May 2026. zzzzzzz

This round the symptoms were mild and I didn't even have any fever. Just that body felt feverish...half warm, half cold. 

May all germs stay away from me pls................................

Junk food

A colleague Leonard just told me he thinks I am one of the few mums he's come across who allows their kids to eat junk food like chips, twisties, sweets, etc. 

I was wondering "really meh?" 

I ended up replying with a "管这些太严，那生活还有什么乐趣呢？"

Lol...I don't think I'm one of the few mums leh.....I see many parents with kids at Mac & other fast food places...I see kids walking around eating sweets & chips too...I just got 2 packs of gummies for the girls last weekend. 

His comment to me on a Monday morning...was kinda odd haha. Maybe ran out of topics for pantry small talk hahaha. 

Mama Day!

Happy Mother's Day!

Nadya gave me a small pink pom pom she made,  a small crocheted flower made with the same pink yarn and a small paper heart with voila.....French words!!...(quite good considering she's only learning French via Duolingo)

"Merci Beaucoup! Je suis contente parce que tu es ma mere.
Happy Mother's Day!
Love, Nana"

She also bought me a slice of my fav marble cake from Bengawan Solo after her Math class too! "From my own savings ok!" she declared hahaha.

And Alyssa, with K's help, made me some scrambled eggs for my breakfast today. Yay I got my protein fix!

Fragrances

I'm not one who uses fragrances. 

Maybe when I was in my late teens or early twenties I'd experimented with some stuff and liked the White Musk body mist from The Body Shop back then. I've not used fragrances much since then. K got me a bottle of Annick Goutal in 2017 or 2018 I think. To date, I've used maybe less than 1/4 of it. He asked me if it can keep that long...I've no idea too haha. 

I have a soft spot for CK One though. Interestingly, I'd never had a bottle of it myself. 

Just the fragrance itself brings back alot of memories. Memories of back when I had my 1st job after graduation. When I was stationed for 2-3 months at my company's retail counter at Takashimaya, with another colleague 2yrs younger but who was taller than me by half a head lol. It was fun working with her there and we'd spend alot of time chatting with each other cos there weren't really much customers around. Fresh from graduation, it was a really fun experience at the time, despite the less than ideal "high-class sales assistant" label that was "plastered" on me. It was interesting too getting to see the hidden cooridors and staff entrances of Takashimaya. It was also during that time when I met 2 guys who were working at the CK pop-up counter right next to mine. And when I had a crush on one of them. Someone who happened to be 3yrs younger lol but quite charismatic. 

Was at Parkway as usual today and there was a pop-up sale at the basement atrium. Various cosmetics and fragrances were on sale. And CK One was there too, along with other ranges from CK like Eternity (which my Dad used to use)....

I thought to buy but hesitated...

Fast forward an hour later, I had a box of it in my hands lol. 200ml. Caved in to nostalgia, memories & K's encouragement. 

Happy!