Xmas Eve Gathering

Recent Xmas gathering at Uncle David’s place, there were some things that stood out to me:

• How our uncles & aunts were all visibly older. Ee-ma though the oldest present was still quite fit for her age. Mobile & still very lucid. Auntie Violet, her sworn sister though, has not been doing too well since a year ago. Though on the surface she looks physically ok but…her mind is not fully there. And her legs can’t support her. Each step brings me worry whether her knees will buckle. Each shuffle brings me worry whether she’ll take a misstep. Even with her mind & body this way, she insisted on neither me nor Ee-ma being in the bathroom with her when she had to use it. As a 晚辈 I don’t have much say but ‘ve asked my Mum before to get a discussion going with her siblings how to handle Auntie Violet’s issues in the very near future. I can’t say much about Auntie Angie’s side of the family, just that they still look pretty alright, except for white hair for the older relatives…and also maybe cos they’re all still younger than my Mum’s siblings…

• This was the 1^st occasion in my entire life that I spoke enough (broken) Cantonese in a single night to exceed whatever Cantonese I spoke in the entire year. And this from a person who can’t speak enough Cantonese to save her life. Largely cos I was conversing with Ee-ma & Auntie Violet. Ee-ma somehow may have forgotten that I usually speak to her in Mandarin lol..and started a few convos with me in Cantonese.

• Glad I had some 1-on-1 time with Suli to catch up a little. We used to be close and had meals together once in awhile…Age, life, work, kids, Covid & I guess or own struggles that we were dealing with meant over the last 10-years plus we grew apart...not intentionally but just naturally. Now that I know she’s back in Tampines, I’ll try to arrange a meal with her sometime next year...

• I used to be the youngest generation at such family gatherings. I was the one who’d be running around with Suli. Now, our kids are the ones who are running around together. And our kids used to be the youngest running around. Now our younger cousins’ kids are the youngest ones running around, and there’s one who just started crawling. Time flows by…

  
  

走 C 路了

This was a year of C-dramas....

Blossom

Prisoner of Beauty

Dream Within a Dream

Legend of the Female General

All period dramas cos...I like them much more than those set in modern times. The costumes & sets are all so nice to look at!

Caught a fair bit of summarised stuff & snippets of other dramas as well

The Sword & The Brocade

Best Partner

Flight to You

Destined

Fateful Love

Paris & London

Family Trip! 4 Dec - 15 Dec 2025

This is my 4th time in Paris...2008, 2010, 2011 and 2025. 

80% of the stuff we did or the places we went to, I'd already experienced haha. It was more for the girls, especially Nadya, who's had more "exposure" to French stuff cos she uses some French words in her ballet learning journey. Alyssa found Paris mostly boring, Nadya could appreciate the history & culture more. 

• Going up the Eiffel Tower was a blast for the girls. They were so tickled by the strong winds. Alyssa got slightly blown off balance too haha. 
• Notre Dame Cathedral was boring for Alyssa but sort of interesting for Nadya who could better appreciate the architecture and history behind some things. 
• The trip up to see the Basilique du Sacre Coeur and have a great view of the city was a little challenging as it was raining (and hence cold & damp) but the girls had fun struggling with their umbrellas and the strong winds lol. Nadya's brolly flipped over so many times haha. We chose not to go in to the cathedral. 
• It was a brief walk at Champs Elysees, then a quick look at Arc du Triomphe. It was my first time walking beneath the Arc though. I'd never known that there were underground linkways there. We had a quick visit to Galaries Lafayette as well, my first time there, and yet another short visit to the Trocadero, specifically the Eiffel Tower Viewing Point. Seeing the tower at night from such a nice viewing point was a first for me and much enjoyable. Alyssa was grouchy throughout most of this night though lol...she was cold, and bored and could not appreciate these sights. 
• We went on a Bateaux Moches river cruise on the Seine as well. I found this boring though...Alyssa too haha. Nadya was counting the number of bridges we passed by so I guess she quite liked the cruise. 
• Fav meal in Paris = our lunch at an Italian restaurant near the Lourve. It's called Enza Famiglia. Pasta was superb. My gnocchi was so delicious!

This is my 2nd time in London. 2010 and 2025. 

Alyssa found this place more fun, possible also because we did more activities that she could understand or that she found interesting. 

• Christmas at Kew Gardens was a light installation event at Kew Gardens, fairly far from where we stayed at King's Cross. The trail took so long to walk through. I think it was definitely more than 1h30mins. It also rained a little at the start so it was quite cold. We were struggling to open and shut our umbrellas at some point as it drizzled heavily, then stopped, then started again zzz. The girls & I were knackered. My face was probably as grouchy as theirs lol. 
• The trip to Harry Potter Warner Brothers Studio was a highlight for me. I'm not a huge fan of the series but it was interesting for me. While the girls were interested, they weren't extremely excited as well lol. But I guess it was still nice enough for them. We got them wands from the gift shop (sibei ex). 
• We did a tour of the Paradox Museum too. This was fun too and the girls really liked this place. Something like the Trick Eye Museum Singapore has. 
• We had a brief walk through the 1st floor of Harrods, also shopped briefly at Soho district.
• Visited the Light Room near King's Cross for an immersive experience about dinosaurs. I like this one but it lasted just an hour or so....so I felt the tickets were not too value for money. 
• The Natural History Museum was so-so...Alyssa felt bored again lol though some of the fossil exhibits were interesting. 
• I initially planned to see the Changing of the Guards outside Buckingham Palace but switched to bringing the girls to the Changing of the Guards at the Horse Guards instead, just down the road from 10 Downing Street. Lesser crowds, easier for them to view and no need to go an hour earlier just to get good viewing spots. 
• Fav meal in London = there's a couple actually! Haha...one was dinner at Rex Cross, near King's Cross station. My grilled chicken was amazing. Even K agreed it was one of the best he's had. The pastas the rest ordered were excellent too! We had nice fish & chips at The Mayfair Chippy, opposite Harrods at Knightsbridge. Alyssa loved this place. And....we had very nice udon at Kineya Mugimaru at St Pancras International Station on our last day in London. The warm udon hit the right spot cos it was a cold day. We liked it so much we had breakfast, and then went back there for lunch on the same day lol.

Thankful for the family time... :)

Not so thankful for the day at Eiffel Tower when my Whatsapp was buzzing alot due to something that happened in office which affected my team lol...Still, am thankful my team could handle it pretty much without me.  

Flight

So fast. It's been 2 weeks since we got back from our Paris & London trip. 

We've not taken a plane since our Osaka trip back in Sept 2018.  

The trip this round was for N's post-PSLE trip. 

I was hesitant. I'd not flown for 7 years. I couldn't even take the bus or train on my own a few years back. While I've more or less trained myself to overcome those over the years....a plane was a different story. Once in, there's no backing out. 

I was nervous on the day we were supposed to fly out. Though I was less nervous than I thought I would be. Perhaps it was because K was there, and the girls too. They have my back. 

It was a 14-hr flight into Paris. Save for the initial 30mins from boarding to take-off and a little while more when I felt nervous and was praying, I think I did very well. I could even look after the 2 girls and bring them to the washroom several times, etc. 

The flight back was pretty similar. I was seated alone on the flight back and I was wondering if I'd be more nervous but it was quite ok. 

Think if I share this with Dr Mok she'd squeal and say she's happy for me haha...

I'm happy too. I overcame this...and the presence of K & the 2 girls were my grounding. 

AHS

Jiejie got herself into Anglican High! 

It was quite a rush settling her textbooks (thanks to K for ordering them online the moment we got the confirmed school posting results lol), her new school shoes, and more importantly, her new uniforms. 

I hope her secondary school journey will be as fun as mine. I hope she finds herself a good bunch of friends like I did (thankfully). I hope she starts to 开窍 abit more and grows more disciplined in her studies. I hope it'll be a great, smooth 4 years ahead for her!! 

Wonder what they call AHS kids? Anglicanian? Anglicanite? AHS-ian?

==================

On Xmas Eve, we showed her how to take the bus & then walk to school.  It's a long walk to school 12/13minutes without her school bag. If she's having a school bag, my guess is it will take longer. Not too bad if it's just a gentle slope or flat ground....thing is, there's a gentle slop for most of the way and then the last 200-300m is a steep slope to the school's main gate. 

I was struggling that day and silently cursing in my head when traversing up the steep slope....I think after a month of walking to school each day, she'll be super fit. Jiayou Nadya!! lol...

Peanut Power

Little girl has done well over the past year. 

She finally worked her way into being a prefect, a goal she set herself since P2. At the end of P3, her form teacher put her name up and voila, she became one in P4 this year. 

She's done well in BICEP, her chinese special programme in school. 

She's now working on becoming a leader in her Brownies. Hopefully she gets the chance to be nominated. 

She did well enough in class to be allocated to one of the better classes in P5. She'll be in a mixed class with GEP kids. Hope her P6 class will provide her a good environment to be in. Her P4 class & some of her good friend in her P4 class were indeed positive influences on her. 

Onwards & upwards!

Deep breaths.

Back to the grind. 

Not liking it so far. 

Handling co-workers who test your patience many times. 

And at the same time handling other distractions/demands. Some walk around on 2 feet and occupy the room next to ours. 

Also not sleeping well. A little jetlagged still perhaps. 

Nanny

Perpetually. 

Tiring. 

Nanny at home.
Have you done your homework? Have you packed your bag? Tomorrow's 行程 will be this followed by that so you have to plan your attire for this & then that. Did you wash your hands? Wash your feet. Brush your teeth. Brush your hair. Go bathe. Clear your clothes! Clear your desk! Clean your desk!

Nanny at work. 
Have you sent it out? Why not? Deadline coming, are you done? Why do I need to remind you? Have you processed? Not yet?? Why?? ST sent you instructions yesterday, till today no action done on your end, let me know why?

Kids I can understand....

Adults who cannot manage their own time or deadlines. I cannot accept. My patience...is sorely tested this year. 

PSLE Results today

Message from a friend "my daughter did not do well". 

And in the end...her daughter got 9M. 

Wah lau. That is a good lor. Single-pointer. Not as good as 4, 5, 6 but still a single-pointer nonetheless.

Then again, I should not be surprised. Such comments always come from her. 

It's always a "my son the Maths cannot make it, I teach till I vomit blood"...then the kid ends up in top 3 in his class. Or it's a "she is very jialat lah I dunno what to say"...and then in the end the daughter becomes a single pointer in PSLE. 

Oh well. 

===========================

As I expected, saw some kids beaming in school today....and some others (boys & girls included) crying. 

Good results or less stellar ones...I hope each kid eventually finds his or her own path in this world. Run or plod, so long as they keep moving and stay on the right side of the road. May they be happy and healthy always.

When you've been married a long time

When you've been married a long time

When your other half is riding the same wave....

会查出 boliao 的火花 hahhaa.....

K: I didn’t buy the (chicken) drumsticks.

Me: Orh, then like that how to play drums?

K: Cannot lor, then we play cymbals.

Me: Oh ya true, MS Word has a lot of symbols.

K: Ya, keyboard also have.

深呼吸

Never thought the Marketing colleague could cause so much annoyance. 

工作能力 is really not up to standard. (alot?) Lower than what I'd expect from an AM. 

disorganised, slipshod, careless, always making mistakes, not meeting deadlines, 

if this were a private organisation, she would have been fired long ago. 

sigh. 

哎哟

忙， 但有时候也不懂在忙什么

工作， 家里的碎事，孩子，自己？

零零碎碎累积起来也挺多的

Stuff to settle: clear out kids old clothes, clear out old textbooks, clear out various parts of the kids room, clear out various parts of my room, pack, clear out own old clothes?, 

motivation kinda low

咋办?

生病了

I seem to fall sick in October. 

Recall taking MC in Oct 2023 and had Influenza A last October after catching it from the younger girl. This time round, it's a viral bug.  

I'd rather just have fever and sleep it away over 2 or 3 days. The cough this time is terrible. Dry itchy cough that is easily triggered by the fan or aircon. I don't need the aircon but it's quite impossible not to turn on the fan. Wearing a mask helps minimise the triggering though so that's helpful. 

Coughing my lungs out. Throat's painful and sore because of the coughing. 

Woke this morning with s sticky and slightly blurry right eye. Had to blink many times before vision cleared up. Hope I'm not getting an eye infection....

Jiayou...get well soon! 

17 October 2025

J'ai 45 ans. Deja. 

Average life expectancy of ladies in SG is 85.6yrs. (at birth, based on Singstats data as at 2024)

Means I am considered past middle-age already is it?

*horrors*

Anyway, it's been a while since I had a nice meal that made me so happy.

Nothing fancy, just vegetarian eefu noodles & my favourite battered eggplant topped with pork floss at Canton Paradise. Coupled with stirfried ginger spring onion beef. And with the company of K. 

Thankful that my birthday fell on Friday. Birthday leave + Deepavali PH on Monday gave me a longer weekend than most folks heh. 

到了这个年份有什么感触？

我也不晓得

只是觉得世界上还有很多事情和人间事故还没理解到，还没探索到，还没接触到

有时候仿佛觉得自己还不如一个刚毕业的年轻人

有时候也觉得越大越有顾虑

Anyway, here's wishing myself continued blessings, good health and happiness always!!

三菜一汤

Long time din update on weight. 

Happily at 49/50kg since end last year or early this year. Just need to maintain this weight. :)  It's weird though, how some folks still say I am too thin. Hmm...nvm..I happy can liao. 

Think it's cos of the regular home-cooked meals over the last 10months since we shifted back to this place. The 三菜一汤 that I diligently plan for each week...comprising of veg + proteins + one soup at each meal...

Unfortunately, I find it hard to remove processed food fully from our meals, given how much we love our sausages, and me my luncheon meat.... ;p

============

speaking of 三菜一汤....

I was racking my brains a few days ago and sought A's help. 

"aiyah I dunno what I want to eat lah, you plan." came the response.

zzzzzzzzzzzz......I made a face.

she followed up with a "aiyah do something simple. like sandwich making. just put the ingredients there and we can make sandwiches ourselves. We can choose whatever ingredients we want."

Hmm...interesting idea....let's see if I can make this happen one of these days....

Maybe discuss with K too. He has a larger appetite. I don't know how many pieces of bread or croissants he needs to have in order to fill his stomach LOL.....

Another 聊 session

In the midst of PSLE exams. Started on 25 Sep Thursday. Ending this Wednesday 1 Oct. 

I hope N is doing ok and not feeling too stressed out. 

She & I had a little talk last night. She could not sleep and asked if I was angry with her as I spoke gruffly to her before I turned off the lights in their bedroom. 

Explained to her that I was getting impatient and thus used a sterner tone with her as she was procrastinating alot and delaying bed time. It is a challenge getting her to brush her teeth & prep for bed. Once, twice, thrice. Multiple times of nagging. And even after she brushes her teeth, it takes ages again for her to get her bed ready. From placing the bolster in a certain way, to the blanket being laid out in a certain way, and the water bottle and watch and clock and her glasses being in certain spots on the shelf on her beadboard, etc. It tests my patience each night. 

Her response? "But it's not my fault."

Hard to talk to her sometimes. 

Hope to find a different way to get through.

Nevertheless, we ended the conversation in a good way with hugs & cuddles & some kisses....and she did not go to bed feeling bad. Glad that at least we 说开了 abit and she did not go to bed with 隔夜仇. 

Mother-Daughter Talk

Had a talk with N last night. A heartfelt one. Been a long long time since I had such a talk with her. 

And I felt strangely at peace while talking to her. I was not judgemental, I was not impatient, I was not trying hard to quell my own bad feelings.  

She spoke most of the time. About how annoyed she was with A, how her parents (yes she referred to her parents in 3rd person form even though I was there) were biased against her, how everyone loves the younger one but does not like the older one, etc. She talked about how A is good in class, is a teacher's pet, is a Brownie and is a prefect, how A seems better at most things, etc. How it is unfair that sometimes A annoys her and starts an argument but the one getting scolded in the end is not A but N, etc...She spoke on how she wanted to scold cuss words at home but could not, how she wanted to throw things or hit something but could not. 

I understood her 委屈, frustrations, anger and annoyance. I shared some anecdotes on how she could vent or let out her frustrations, etc. Also shared how she should not do anything to hurt or injure herself in the process.... 

Inwardly, I felt I could have done better as a parent...sigh...to minimise feelings of "comparisons", to be there for each of them in my own ways, etc...I will try...

Gordon

Got news yesterday that Gordon had a massive stroke at home and was warded in ICU. Visited him today and found out from Celine that it wasn't a stroke at all but it was a ruptured aneurysm near his brain stem, deep within the brain.

One of those things you could not have known about and could not have prevented. It seems there was heavy bleeding and his brain is  now permanently damaged. There seems to be no reversal nor recovery from this as well. Otherwise, his heart and other organs are all functioning perfectly fine. His vitals are all ok too. 

He just retired last year and was spending his time rather fruitfully with Celine dragging him on trips overseas, taking long walks, even going for barista courses, volunteering with various church activities, etc...

Life is unpredictable.

Feeling a little emo. 

Once again, I am thankful, very thankful....that my aneurysm did not rupture when I was 25 and that it was discovered early on and treated successfully. 

hmmmm

More flustered these days again and just want to 躺平. 

什么都不想做， 什么都不想想

只想躲在我窝里

能吗？

丢信的念头又来了， 今年仿佛有了好几次， 以前都没这么想过的 hmm.....

LPAs

Adrian helped parents to do up their LPA yesterday. I was one of the donees and had to login to the OPG portal to accept this role. Then I realised from the portal....K & I did ours up 4 years ago in end 2020....how time flies...

I told my parents about it at the time and it took them 4 years to execute....mainly cos Adrian guided them how to do so. My fault, I didn't follow-through. Also cos...they told me they wanted to read up on their own first. 

Anyway...nvm.....