(Long long long post...)
To my 8-year-old self:
Sweetie, it is very rude to tell someone else "Byebye fat pig!". Even if that other person is really on the heavier end of the weighing scale. You have much to learn about respect, diplomacy, good behavior and social etiquette. And, you totally embarrassed your parents when you said that to their friends' kid. Be nice. Treat others the way you would want to be treated.
Stop comparing yourself with others. All girls develop differently and to each their own pace. You are unique and beautiful in your own way. Don't worry about being left on the shelf too, the boys will come next time....trust me.
To my 15-year-old self:
Rock on! Stay cheerful! Continue nurturing and developing those friendships of yours for they will turn out to be some of the best ones you will ever have.
To my 16-year-old self:
It is okay to have some healthy competition amongst your peers in school. Just don't make it an all-consuming goal to best every single one of them in each test or exam. It burns you out way too quickly. There are still many years ahead of you, both in terms of schooling and then working.
Pace yourself and learn to take it easy sometimes. Scoring a mark less than that other brainy girl is no biggie, save for the fact that your ego took a slight knock. And so what if you were the only student in the whole school to get an A1 for English Literature or if you were the top O-level student in your school for your cohort? It means little when you go out to work in the future. Really, it doesn't mean a thing.
To my 17-year-old self:
Like I said. Learn to take it easy. Slow down. Smell the roses. Don't put too much pressure on yourself and don't have such high expectations of yourself. Don't put too many things on your plate either. It really does burn you out. Nobody is asking you to be top-notch at everything from studies to ECA. Your parents aren't even telling you to. Taking the anti-depressant Xanax for 2 weeks is fine. It wouldn't be good at all if you needed to take it for months or years.
To my 19-year old self:
Enjoy the freedom doll. But bear in mind too that you need to be responsible for your actions. Don't lose focus. Getting the first Ds in your life was a sound wake-up call, right? Enjoy all the hostel activities but erm, do remember that all suppers eventually end up on your waist, thighs and hips. And well, I told you the boys would come. Choose wisely. Years spent and lost with the wrong person by your side would never be regained.
To my 22-year-old self:
It is okay to not know what you want. It is okay to be lost and unsure of what you want your career to be. Go forth and explore but at the same time, don't shortchange yourself. And, don't be too naive.
To my 24-year-old self:
Use your youth wisely. It is one of your biggest asset so don't squander it away. Sure, spend your days having fun and enjoying life but also, do spend some time enriching yourself and learning new things. In business and at work, treat others with respect. You'll earn theirs too.
And, your parents might be a pain in the ass but that is because they've been through life and they sometimes really do know better.
To my 25-year-old self:
Life throws you major curveballs sometimes. You'll have to learn to live with it. Surround yourself with friends who love and support you. They make a difference to how wonderful your life can be. Plus sometimes you need their help to manage those damned curveballs. And, your parents, however callous or overbearing or naggy or argumentative they might be, really just love you to bits. That's just the way they show it. Love them back with equal ferocity, if not more.
To my 27-year-old self:
Everyone changes. Everyone has a different side to them. And everyone makes mistakes. If some of these people happen to be your closest friends, learn to accept their failings and more importantly, learn from their misjudgements. For those who are willing to change, be there for them. It may seem like there is no sanctity in marriage or relationships anymore but for every bad situation you come across, know that there are at least 20 other good ones.
To my 28-year-old self:
Remember again that life throws you curveballs. Sometimes it cuts deep and breaks your heart into a million shards. But that is so that you can heal again and be reborn as a stronger and wiser person. Go easy on the drinks by now. You're not as young as you used to be and your stomach is not as strong as it used to be. 4 small bottles of beer every Friday night for a year and more seems of little significance but trust me, cut down on the drinks and your health and stomach will be thankful later on in life.
Embrace the opportunities given to you at work. Embrace the travel opportunities as well. Learn and experience things. It helps your mind grow.
To my 29-year-old self:
Rejuvenation and recalibration sometimes go hand in hand. Be brave and open new doors. Be open and love again. Be courageous. Yes and keep up with the exercise. Your body will thank you for it. Feed your brain with new things too so it doesn't stagnate. Work hard, but do take a step back to smell the roses and play a little as well.
To my 32-year-old self:
Live and let live. Sometimes taking a step back works better for the good of the whole situation. Changes may be for the better. They definitely test your limits and adaptability and they definitely give you an opportunity to learn and grow.
To my 33-year-old self:
Don't worry. You are doing just fine. Yes, you may feel the need to step up but bear in mind too that motherhood is a learning journey. No one knows what to do immediately when they become a mother. Do take care of yourself too. When you are fine and well, you can then care for your little one in your biggest capacity. Oh, and I bet you didn't know your heart could be filled with so much love, right?
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