Quite guilty for making Alyssa feel disappointed.
We have a morning ritual where I peep out of the window and wave bye to her when she's at the carpark (when she leaves for school). And we'd give each other arm and finger heart signs too. I cherish these moments for they give me strength, and I think she hold these moments dear to her heart too.
Been even more scatter-brained in recent days and I was late to get to the window this morning. (had to speak with the helper on something). By the time I got there, K & her were in the car already. And he was slowly driving off. I was hoping she was craning her neck to see my window from the car (not even sure if she can see my from that angle)....and I was waving frantically from the window. :(
K later told me that she had waited for me and stalled getting in the car. When she finally got in reluctantly, he said she was leaning her head on the side of her car seat looking glum...and she told him "I miss Mama."
I was quite upset at botching this morning's ritual. :(
Was beating myself up over it actually...though I recognise that I need to snap out of it and can't let it bog me down too much.
I'm really sorry my baby girl....
I can only take comfort in that I gave you a big hug and kiss this morning and said my usual words to you to start the day (another ritual of ours). And that you chose this morning to voluntarily tell me 'I love you Mam!" after you put on your shoes....
Mama will do better next time baby girl...
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