Of wails and beams

And so. The 4 days of CNY holidays have come and are almost gone.

Some relatives have stopped giving me angpow. :( They told me I am big already, I should be getting married quickly, and hence, I shouldn't be getting angpows anymore. *wails*

A cousin said I have an angular face. I thought "angular" was used to describe men?? *wails*

An aunt said I have put on weight compared to last time. She said I have round cheeks. *wails*

My sister-in-law said I have mature looking hands i.e. old looking hands. She said my mum's hands look better than mine. But I moisturise everyday what!!!! *wails*

Oh. But then.

Another aunt said that the older I get, the better I look. *beams*

Another cousin said I am still slim and looking good. *beams*

I had (and will still have!!!) the "zi mo" luck in my mahjong games haha. *beams*

I had the chance to treat my brother's family to dinner. *beams*

Gastronomic Delights

• Pineapple Tarts
• Bak Kwa
• Kueh Lapis
• Heh Bee Hiam
• Cashew Nut Cookies
  
• Cuttlefish Slices
• Coconut Sweets
• Prawn Crackers
• Fish Keropok
• Berlinjau Keropok
• Tapioca Fried Sticks
• Agar Agar
• Fatt Choy
• Yu Sheng
• Fish Maw Soup
• Abalone
• Riesling
• Chardonnay
• Mango Cake
• Curry Chicken
• Chrysanthemum Tea
• Buah Keluak
  
• Kong Bah Pow
• Fried Bee Hoon
• Fried Vermicelli
• Sushi
  
• Sashimi
• Chawanmushi
  
• Green Tea
• Chye Tow Kueh
• Salad
• Chap Chye
• Pizza
• KFC
• Cereal Prawns
• Steamed Fish
• Tofu
• Sea coconut with white fungus
• Fried Rice

Um.

Just some of the things which went into my tummy since the eve of CNY.

Heh.

Industrious. Not.

I brought home some work to clear on the eve of CNY. Naively thinking I would have the time and discipline to complete most of it over the long CNY holidays.

Err, I attempted to clear some portions of it.

I. Tried. My. Best. To. Concentrate.

Ok, maybe it wasn't a very good attempt but I think the work which I managed to do is still passable. As for the rest of the work....errrr, they have remained untouched.

It happens every year.

Sheesh. And I don't know why I have not learned lol.

zzz

I couldn't sleep last night.

I was flipping around in bed for a good few hours till 3am.

May tonight bring me my much needed deep beauty sleep.

Good night world.

friends

I suddenly miss having lunch with Kelvin Han. Time flies darn fast.
It's been 1.5years since he left IDA.

We made a good team and took turns organising lunches and birthday gatherings. Even if others had their lunch appointments, most of the time, the two of us would still be the core two people who would go for lunch.

And there would thus be a regular lunch group.

These days...it's a dynamic lunch group...more dispersed..with certain factions forming.
And some rivalries/sensitivities between some people....It gets a little tiring trying to sync everyone up and make everyone happy.

Kel & I spoke a little over MSN this morning. He was working from home and thus could enjoy the luxury of having his MSN switched on while clearing work. We reminisced a little, talked rot a little and made a pact to have a gathering with some of the rest sometime in end March or early April.

I hope the gathering pulls through. It's be nice to get together again with some of those who have left....

:(

The weather is making me feel melancholic.
Cold and damp. Winds blowing. It's bringing my mood down.

I went to visit Gran after work just now. She was supposed to have been discharged but then she had some slight seizures and so had to be kept in the hospital. When I was there two nurses were changing her out of her dirty clothes.

She had wet herself again. Perhaps she's too used to having diapers in the nursing home. Or perhaps it's just old age and a general difficulty in controlling her bowels...Apparently, in the early afternoon, she didn't realise that she had shit on the bed. Dad was there and he told me about it.

When the nurses were done, she was feeling very cold and had huddled under the blanket. She also had on a black cardigan which had little yellow, blue and pink flowers sewn onto the front of the it. Very old-school and quite a nice cardigan actually. Adrian had gotten it for her as a Christmas present some years back. I think it was from Yue Hwa in Chinatown.

Anyway all she wanted to do was sleep and so all I could do was to stroke her head and pat he leg from time to time.

A senior staff nurse came after about 15mins and we both tried to wake her up for her dosage of 7-8 medicine pills, her nightly eye drops (a different type for each eye) and her nightly nasal puff (to aid in breathing and for clearing the airways).

She was grumpy. Fought with the nurse, swatted our hands away and declared that she wanted to sleep. "DON'T DISTURB ME" she growled in Malay. She then pulled the blanket over her head and hid under there, ignoring even me.

The senior staff nurse didn't want to agitate her anymore and left Gran as she was.

I couldn't do anything much and left soon after as well.

I don't know how to describe Granny actually. A feisty frail old lady?
Oxymoron leh..hmm.

Anyway, CNY plans are quite screwed up now. I was looking forward to staying at home and having visitors over on the first day because we were intending to bring Gran home. Adrian, Mei & Marc would go around visiting and representing our family.

Now it seems like the new plan is for the whole family to go out visiting together. All squeezed into one car, Adrian, Mei, Marc, Dad, Mum and myself. Sigh. I didn't get suitable clothes for going out....I bought something quite casual to be worn at home. Sigh. I forsee...a tedious 1st day for CNY.

Gran

It takes a lot of patience and understanding to care for patients. It takes an incredible amount of patience, understanding and strength to care for mentally-ill patients, physically disabled patients and elderly patients, especially those who have dementia.

I salute all the doctors, nurses and care-givers who have in one way or another, taken care of my granny in hospital or in the nursing home.

==========
Gran’s in hospital again. Been in there since Thursday last week for a gout attack on her right leg. And she had a suspected minor stroke on Saturday morning.

Those who visited her yesterday said she was doing fine. She could talk lucidly and crack jokes. She could understand things which were said to her and was aware of things in the real world.

I was there with Dad during lunch today.

She wasn’t doing good today. Physically almost okay but mentally out of sync.

When we arrived, we found her at the nurses’ station. She was strapped to a wheelchair and ranting about needing a nurse to phone her son. She saw us and recognized us. But she called my father her father, and she called me her daughter. Took her a few minutes to realize her mistake. But well, at least she did realise her mistake and could still remember my name thereafter.

We found out later on that she had climbed out of her bed and was tottering to the toilet on her own. Risk of falling is extremely high and risk of severe injuries from falling is equally high. Luckily a nurse saw her in time and since that incident, they had to put her in a wheelchair next to their station so that she wouldn’t sneak out of her bed anymore.

She was fixated on a particular thought that made zero sense. She kept saying that either Dad or Adrian was working in the hospital and she could ask the nurses to call either one to come and bring her home. She kept talking about this.

We tried distracting her by talking about other things but she would always go back to that.

Sometimes, she would speak and get so emotional and upset that her face turns red and I half-expect teardrops to fall. Said she'd be better off dead, amongst other things.

Sigh. It’s days like this when I feel helpless and sad.

Gatherings

And so another weekend goes by in a jiffy.

Thursday night was dinner with Daniel.
Friday night was a full 8-course Teochew Chinese dinner and lohei with the Duckies.
And Saturday night was a Thai dinner followed by drinks at Marina Mandarin Hotel with the sec sch gang.

Good few days. May there be many more good days to come in 2011. :)

p/s: been eating and eating and eating....more eating over CNY. *burp*

Conversations

Once upon a time....

C: f*** you lah
M: no cannot. I got hole but you got no stick
C: i can wear a strap-on
M: hahahahha


*to be continued*

Laments

I am a zombie today. With a stomach that is not doing too good. And a body that is retaining too much water.

Zombieness. I felt myself float through the crowds on the bus and the train station and in the train. I think I floated from the Promenade station to my office tower and somehow got to my floor and then to my desk. And now I feel like I’ve a piece of rock for my head, heavy and unwielding.

Slept late last night.

Discomfort. I think I need to install an internal reminder or internal warning system of some sort. Maybe some neuron could send a buzzing sound to my ear everytime I say yes to a glass of beer.

I forgot that in the last one to two years, I’ve developed an intolerance to beer. After having just one glass or mug or small bottle, my stomach will have an adverse reaction. Sometimes I am ok, most times I am not. It happened again last night when I was out for dinner with Daniel. I forgot and had beer…which resulted in me having a bad tummy this morning. I still feel bloated and uncomfortable…:(

Bloatedness. The discomfort of my tummy is further amplified by the general feeling of bloatedness. Something most women go through when that time of the month is drawing near. Oh why do my symptoms always change each cycle? It could be a breakout this time round, then it changes to bloatedness the next time round, and then after that aches and pains for the next cycle.
I think I might not achieve much at work today. Especially with 80% of my team being on leave or at reservist.

birthdays.

I don’t like it when some people come to you and tell you that their birthday is coming soon. Seriously, what are you expecting by broadcasting? A treat? A present?

And then there are others who treated you on your birthday and then suddenly reappears and asks you out for dinner sometime round their own birthday, expecting a treat back from you.

It is quite tiresome and it irks me.

LDR

Acronyms are part and parcel of my job. Yes, I'm a public servant.

So. LDR.

Long-Distance Relationship.

LDRs are not easy. One's here, the other's there. One's in this time zone, the other's in a time zone 7-8 hours slower than yours. When you're happy, you can't just call and share your joy immediately. When you're sad and things really get you down, you can't ring and pour out your sorrow. When you're frustrated about what life has to offer you, you can't just call and speak your mind.

It is really not a nice feeling when you find yourself down in the dumps and need someone to talk to or hold you but there isn't anyone. The loneliness and sadness you feel gets amplified multiple-fold.

But.

When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade.

You learn to cope. You learn to adjust. You learn to adapt. You learn to love the other party even more. You learn to appreciate the other party even more. Add a generous dash of committment and the equation balances itself.

I just heard of a couple who recently went their separate ways. Girl's overseas and guy's over here.

Other reasons were present though the split was largely due to them being in an LDR. I know the girl and I heard she wasn't taking it very well. Oh of course. Who would take such things well and easily? (except scumbags maybe) But I'm sure she'll bounce back in no time. She seems the resilient sort.

I'll admit. Though I do feel for the girl and can imagine the heartache she must be going through right now, secretly, I am just very thankful K & I have managed to work hard to keep things going. I really do appreciate his efforts and love him even more for it.

I am thankful too for the technology that has allowed us to keep in touch ever so often.
Skype, MSN, WhatsApp.

Oh I wish there were a teleporting device. Then couples in LDRs can teleport to each other in an instant. :)

Titles are cumbersome

I bought stuff today again. Small little things. To feed some of my interests haha.

- a bottle of plant food for African Violets (and yes Ally, I think this bottle will last me for years too...lol, unless you want to throw yours away and then I can give you half of my new bottle)
- a packet of cream-coloured pearl beads, each about 5mm in diameter
- a 1.3mm crochet needle

Yay, I'll have things to occupy me during CNY Day 1 when I'll be cooped up at home waiting for guests to arrive. We're bringing Granny home from the nursing home for that day so I'm expecting the relatives to come again this year.

Plus, I've just started on an interesting book set in 1940s and 1950s Hong Kong. Pre-war and post-war Hong Kong. From the eyes of rich Englishmen, rich Chinese and the Portugese. The socialites of that era. Interesting interesting interesting. :)

Buzz

I’m buzzing.

I don’t know if it’s the Chinese New Year festivities or the cosmic forces ushering in the Rabbit year. Perhaps it’s because a new year has started or the prospect of a bonus and increment coming in April. I don’t know.

But I’m buzzing. I feel it in my strides. I feel it in the energy flowing through me. I feel it on the tiny hairs on my skin.

Maybe it’s just the medication. Maybe it’s the crisp winds blowing everyday now. Maybe, just maybe, it’s the shopping which I’ve been doing almost everyday for the past week or so.

It could be....
The anticipation of K coming over in Feb. :)

Daiso-liciously Fun!

I went to Daiso after work today. The one at Plaza Singapura.

I spent a lovely lovely 1hour plus looking through the aisles and aisles of things that they have. From knick-knacks to toys to cosmetics to crockery to cutlery to DIY things to gardening tools to stationery to fabrics to food to toiletries to socks to hats to bags to cushions to...gosh the list seems non-exhaustible...(is there such a word? non-exhaustible? oh nvm, you get what I mean)

And each item at only $2...I could go bonkers in there.

But due to time constraints and to a little voice nagging at me that no I don't actually need a toilet seat cover or a net to keep out insects, I ended up with only 19 items. And thus only spent $38 in the shop.

I think I might go back soon. Hehe. And go on a rampage in there. Perhaps.

I don't have pictures of the things that I got...but here's a simple list based on memory...

- gift wrapper @ 2 different types
- a pretty envelope with greenish flowers on it
- a small spade for gardening
- a small bottle with a curved nozzle for gardening
- a small red pouch with japanese traditional art on it
- a face cleansing device which has tiny rubber bristles to clear your pores of dirt and other sebaceous materials
- an octupus flavoured snack
- a pair of stockings
- a table cloth which was supposed to be used for placing your cutlery on but which I will use to cover my laptop in office
- 2 ceramic cups which were originally meant for drinking out of but which I use for bu8ilding more terrariums
- a packet of coloured post-it-pads
- a 50cm long piece of white sopnge for my mum to do her cleaning with
- 2 balls of thick thread, one pink and one pale green for me to do some crocheting with
- a packet of small white cobble stones/pebbles for me to build my terrariums with


That's 17 items already.....but for the life of me, I cannot remember what the last 2 items are haha.....:)

Till here. For the Shell needs her beauty sleep.

Tsk Tsk

This second round of cough medication is rather strong.

It knocked me out at 11pm last night and I didn’t wake till the sun came streaming into my room. I slept through two alarms. As a result, I reached office at 930am today.

Gosh, I’m getting less and less punctual for work. I need to work harder on this.
Perhaps sleeping earlier will help? Hmm.

My little garden

Terrariums are supposed to be easy to care for. Fittonias are hardy indoor plants and are supposed to be easy to care for too.

I have no idea how, in my month-long absence, my mum managed to almost destroy one of my open-air terrariums. It's the smallest terrarium somemore, just a small little jar which used to house preserved soy beans.

Sigh, I told her not to water it anymore since I'm back. She watered it anyway. And didn't bother taking notice of how water-logged it already was. I discovered, to my horror, that the water level was above the soil. My plants were SWIMMING in muck. And she didn't notice it.

Sigh.

And they were probably waterlogged alot of times during my absence. One can tell by looking at their stems and leaves. You know those science experiments we did in primary school where you take a white rose, stick it in blue colour water and its leaves and petals start turning blue after a day or two? Well the plants in this terrarium had stems which were brown in colour and some of the leaves were half brown too, after having taken in too much muddy water.

So I spent my whole afternoon saving this terrarium. Took out the plants and repotted them elsewhere. Transplanted newer, younger and fresher stalks of fittonias into the jar instead. And of course I drained out as much water as I could.

Repotted my other pots of fittonias into larger pots and also the plant that Ally gave me last night. Hehe, so sweet, she gave me one of her pots of African Violets. Yay new plant for me! :)

Oh yes, did I mention my mum also murdered my cactus? I came back last Friday to see a grey-brown looking lump of what-used-to-be-vegetation instead of my fresh green cactus. Sigh, no cactuses for the time being till I get my other plants in order.

I might need to stock up on my soil, sphagnum moss, activated charcoal, and pebbles hmmm.
Maybe I might need some more pots too, prettier ones. Ally gave me an idea, I'll visit Daiso tomorrow to see what deals I can get there. :D

Ayam Buah Keluak

It has been a tradition in my family since eons ago. Since I was old enough to remember, we've always had Ayam Buah Keluak as one of the main dishes during CNY. Nothing too strange about it since I grew up in a household strongly influenced by Peranakan practices. My Granny's Peranakan for the uninitiated.

Granny used to helm this task each year. She'd do almost everything herself and I remember running around in the kitchen watching her prepare this dish when I was young. (Mind you, this is a dish which is tedious to prepare and needs alot of effort.)

That was up until the time when she didn't have the strength anymore to cook and prepare everything. And then my mum took over. With Granny giving instructions by the side or doing the simple things like chopping up the spices to be used for the gravy paste.

And then the time came when Granny couldn't even handle a knife. Mum took over completely. And it was around that time as well when Dad & I were roped in as helpers.....that was at least 5-6 years ago or it could have been longer.

Anyway it was no different this year. Mum & Dad bought the nuts at a Bedok South stall about 2 weeks back at $0.30 for each nut. About a week ago, Mum scrubbed them clean and soaked them in a pot of water.

This morning, Dad & I set about our arduous task of "tackling" the nuts. Dad, with his trusty screwdriver and heavy duty hammer, cracked open the nuts and I, with my trusty metal plier, would pry open the cracks further and enlarge the holes in the nuts, till the holes were big enough to fit a finger inside.

After the nuts were cracked open, we then had to scrape out all the contents within. Mum would then mix fish paste with the nut fillings. Dad & I then had to fill the empty nutshells up again with this new prepared buah keluak paste.

In the meantime, Mum would be frying the spices and getting the gravy base ready. And preparing the chicken drumsticks and chicken pieces to be thrown in together with the buah keluak.

By the time Dad & I were done, it was already close to 12pm. 2.5hours of work just to prepare the nuts.

And Mum still had to cook them in the soup base together with the chicken pieces.

By the time she was done, it was already 2-something close to 3pm.

5hours of work.

3 person's efforts.

2 big pots of Ayam Buah Keluak.

Nonya dishes are really tedious to prepare.

Maybe that's why they taste so so good.

And oh yes, we saved a tupperware of it for someone who's salivating in Europe right now. ;p

My Sunday

It was a tiring day. Up till late afternoon at least.

I woke early at 8-something which never happens on a Sunday morning. I set my alarm clock to wake me up that's why. ;p Checked my office email, harvested the crops in my Smurfs village and then read some of today's newspapers.

Came 930am and it was time to start the family tradition. Oh, at least it's a tradition between my parents and I. The annual Ayam Buah Keluak cooking session. Tedious thing but that's gonna be a whole post on its own.

Anyway, finished that by lunch time, had my lunch, rested awhile. And then it was gardening time. I was at it for a good 2.5hours. Details to be shared later. After bonding time with my plants, it was a quick shower and then bonding time with K.

:) It was morning in London and he had to sit at his hotel's lounge which was the only place that had WIFI in the whole building. Skyped for an hour and then it was dinner.

I spent dinner camped out in front of the TV and watching an episode of the new Korean serial showing on KBS Channel 115. Finished that and then...

Voila, here I am in front of the PC again. :) I just popped my antibiotics and had my cough syrup which would guarantee a drowsy me by the time 945pm comes. Just nice for bedtime anyway.

Strange

2010 was a strange year. In the sense that nothing major happened in my life. No significant milestone, no big events.

Since 2004, there has been something significant happening in my life each year. Be it a positive or negative event, there would definitely be something big happening each year.

For 2010 however, nothing major occurred. Nothing I could say which made a big impact on my life. The year was surprisingly calm, plain and simple.

Hmm. I wonder what 2011 has in store for me.