more yodelling...

1st day back at work...
The train was unusually quiet. Think alot of peeps took leave to extend their hols.
Damn , I should have taken too..haha...

Brain engine was slower than usual. More like droning & whirring & whining than pumping with adrenalin...
Sometimes had to read a sentence twice to get what it was trying to convey..

Had a nice lunch makan with Siva..went Sakae again..wheeee!!
And my new sushi fav...*drumroll* SOFTSHELL CRAB TEMAKI!!
Aka soft shell crab handroll...wah...damn shiok! *salivating again*
Had two of it today..heee...all thanks to dasao who intro-ed me to it...
And of course, I had to have my chawanmushi...and my salmon.. :)

=========
Hmm..his back was aching today..went to see sinseh, had a massage session and took the day off...
That bugger...biathlon coming..better not strain himself too much...
*worried*

Damn, my back's aching too..and shoulders..haha...shall psycho him for a massage..

=========
Woohoo!!! Looking forward to dinner on Friday and "Huo Yuan Jia" aka "Fearless" on Saturday!!!

Heard that " I Not Stupid 2" is not bad too...yeah, will catch it another day...=)))

=========
Time flies..
I've only got a lesson left for Malay.
Hope they have the Intermediate one starting up...

Else it'll be GMAT for me liao...

=========
Abit sad..the conversation as per follows:

Jessie: "Eh, you've been dropping hair ah?"

Me: *Cringes* "Har? You mean it's so obvious ah?" *touches right side of head*

Jessie: "Of course lah! Now so flat and thin! I can see through to your ears liao..."

Me: *Jaws Drop* *Flabbergasted*

Is there some kinda tonic I can take to boost hair growth? Or some kinda food I should take?
And please...don't tell me to rub XO on my scalp............

=========
The world is so small...
Turned out that PQ's Godma...is Ah Long's mother-in-law...
And Ah Long's wife taught her piano when she was in primary school...
Kaozz...how concidental can it get??

My buddy for the last 13 years...is god-sister to my CEO's wife...which makes him her god-brother-in-law??
But heng lah, they don't really keep in touch...except for festive occassions like CNY.
*rolls eyes*

Piangzz...and I wonder why time flies...It's already Feb!!

It's already February. We're into the 2nd month of the year.
Just when I thought I just finished ushering in 2006...!

Ah well..let's see, what happened over the last 2 days was a flurry of activities..
2nd day of CNY..he came for lunch, I went to his place for dinner too..we caught Memoirs of a Geisha @ PS...he went for a swim while I read a book..yada yada..

Went over to Binggen's place later on in the night to be with the rest as well..
Haha...highlight of the night..the newly discovered game of "Ah-So-Ko"..hard to describe here but it's a group game..and as usual..forfeits galore! haha...
No alcohol for me though cos the boss was around.. =p Lotsa laughter...food for the soul.. =D

Bro was high man...haha...whole face was red..running & skipping around like a lil dynamo...
But damn!!! I missed the BIG SMOOCH of the night!!!!!
Heng I've got a pic of it...*wink wink* .....kekekekee....courtesy of BG...

Think I laughed too much whilst there...couldn't get to sleep and was tossing around till 4am...brain was still awake...

Got up at 9am on 3rd of CNY. Rushed around trying to bath and then get dressed, do my make-up and eat my breakfast at the same time...Went to Ah Gor's place...
Haha...was helping to feed Marc during the journey there...
Man oh man..now I really feel like a full-fledged Aunt.
Haha...nothing beats feeding your own nephew and watching him clamber up your leg for more peanut butter sandwich....MUAHAHAHA!! *grinz*

Came back home after the visit, took lunch and collapsed in a heap on my bed...
Awoke with a shock when I received a call from TH...shucks, supposed to have been at PQ's place at 4pm..he called at 3:35pm, and I was still sleeping...
And so another rush started again...got dressed, did make-up, tried to find oranges and a paper bag, tried to find my wallet!! blah blah blah...

Finally reached her place at 415pm...not so bad lah..
And yeah..*cheers* here's to the start of my tai-tai life..haha...learnt mahjong there...from who else but TH himself..the recent King of itchy fingers...
Played minimal rounds though..cos I was still trying to learn and get all the funny terminologies right...
Kaozz..peng hu, zi mo, pong, gang, pong pong hu, gar, qing yi se, ban se...*faint*

Dinner at her place was steamboat..much thanks to her mum & dad for preparing the food and all..so paiseh..haa...there was even abalone, pacific clams and lotsa lotsa prawns...
Couldn't finish the prawns..in the end, we tried something unique..haa, cooked the prawns, peeled them..and added them into our yu sheng!!
Innovative hr??? hahah tasted not bad too! =))
And since the boss was not around, hehe...aka, no government...I allowed myself half a cup of vodka lychee....=)

Reached home at 12-plus...and collapsed for the 2nd time that day into my sweet little haven of a bed...

Horoscope

I am the seasoned traveller
Of the Labyrinth.
The genius of alacrity,
Wizard of the impossible.
My brilliance is yet unmatched
In its originality.
My heart is filled with potent magic
That could cast a hundred spells.
I am put together
For mine own pleasure.

I am the Monkey.

============
Lest you think the above was written by me.
I can assure you. It's not. Pulled it off from some obscure webby.

============
The Year Ahead..
A difficult year as the Monkey's plans go awry and people break their promises to him. He may suffer losses in his investments and should not lend money to anyone. A year in which he will discover who his real friends are. Disappointments will make him realize where and how he went wrong.

Monkey and Dragon
One of the best unions. Mutual love and understanding of each other. Very strong affinity in love and business relations. Prosperous and successful team.

~Chu Yi~

Wahey! CNY!!
But it's quite a boring half a day so far..collected a few ang pows..other than that..lotsa time spent waiting for relatives to come...zzz...

Was chatting with JM last night..hehe..and came to some interesting revelations about myself..
He said I was quite "gal"..and I went like "huh??"
So I quizzed him about it. Turned out that what he meant was that he felt I was "gu niang"... Hmm..."xiao jie" was a term he used to describe me too.
Guess he ain't seen the crude side of me yet aye?
*hiak hiak*

Oh yah, said I was vulnerable too...the kind that needs protection from others...
And that I should use it to my advantage in work..haha..said that it'll be easier for me to seek favours from other peeps.

Hmm..interesting.

...Back to waiting...*yawnz*
Think I shall go do some office work...

F*ck

Win & I came to a conclusion last week.
One of our New Year Resolutions for 2006 has unceremoniously ground to a halt.

Within just two weeks into 2006, our rebellious tongues have gone back to their expletive-uttering ways again. English, Hokkien, Chinese, you name it.

Nabei, just when I thought I could do it.

Acckkk..
*pouts*

CNY visiting...

Tomorrow's yet another day of false smiles and forced greetings.
To relatives whom you see only once a year and whom you'll prolly not recognise when you walk past them on the streets.
And whose names you don't even know cos you call them all either Uncle or Auntie.
Yeah, every single guy who walks in through the door and is your elder is termed as "Uncle". Likewise for the opposite sex.

For the younger folk, guess I don't even bother to remember which kid is whose child.
And I have to doubly admit, I don't bother knowing how the hell I'm even related to all these people.
Whether it's by name or by some distant blood lineage.
Ahh...Let it be..

I used to go out visiting with my parents. Think the last time I did that was like 4-5 years ago?
But ever since Granny has gotten older and has more difficulty handling drinks and all for the visitors, my role's been changed.
Bro & Dasao'll be out and I'll be at home helping Granny.

In a way, I don't mind this role reversal.
Cos I get to stay at home and not melt under the sweltering heat outside.
But aw man, I just hate those small talk sessions..where each party racks their brains so hard to come up with disinteresting topics.
And the awkwardness & tenseness when each has nothing better to say anymore...
At which point the host aka me, has to say, "Eat more! Drink more! Help yourselves!"
Granny's hearing is really bad now, so I'm the one who does the talking...

And it's the same few mundane anal questions every year..
Where are you working at?
What are you working as?
When are you getting married?
How old are you by the way?

Mom made a comment today.
"When your granny passes on, I don't think there will be anymore of such visits. I think we'll all lose contact with each other. Cos the only reason they'll visit is to show respect for your granny. "
Which I totally agree with.

PSY aka ...

Park Shin Yang.
The guy who acted as Han Qi Zhu in "Lovers in Paris"..aka, the elder brother..the one always in suits...
What a talented guy.

Dasao found his website and told me to go take a look..

Studied in Russia.
Studied film & drama for 10 years..fluent in English and Korea..and I suppose Russian as well.
Hockey player..furniture designer..
Good singer too...
Has even written 4 books.
Love the way he writes his poems in the site.

*swoons*

Can't believe he's 38 though..doesn't look like it..

www.parkshinyang.com

tis a day to be marked in history!

Surprises are sweet...
*blink blink blink*

Met up with him at Bugis J around 5-plus today..
And the moment we met, he offered to carry my bag.
First reaction from me was a blank stare...well, if you consider that a reaction at all.
Next reaction after a momentary lapse was: "Har? You sure??"

Cos' it's the 1st time I ever heard that from him.
Let's not talk about shopping bags or plastic bags of stuff.
I'm talking about my handbag.
Hmm...quite big somemore haha...the boxy straw bag that's so common nowadays..

Haha, anyway which girl would reject such a kind gesture of offer?
Kinda cute to see him carry my bag.. =D
*beams*

When I'm Gone - Eminem

Yeah...
It's my life...
My own words I guess...

Have you ever loved someone so much, you'd give an arm for?
Not the expression, no, literally give an arm for?
When they know they're your heart
And you know you were their armour
And you will destroy anyone who would try to harm 'her
But what happens when karma, turns right around and bites you?
And everything you stand for, turns on you to spite you?
What happens when you become the main source of her pain?
"Daddy look what I made", Dad's gotta go catch a plane
"Daddy where's Mommy? I can't find Mommy where is she?"
I don't know go play Hailie, baby, your Daddy's busy
Daddy's writing a song, this song ain't gonna write itself
I'll give you one underdog then you gotta swing by yourself
Then turn right around on that song and tell her you love her
And put hands on her mother, who's a spitting image of her
That's Slim Shady, yeah baby, Slim Shady's crazy
Shady made me, but tonight Shady's rocka-by-baby...

And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn
Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice
Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling
And I didn't feel a thing,
So baby don't feel my pain
Just smile back
And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn
Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice
Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling
And I didn't feel a thing,
So baby don't feel my pain
Just smile back...

I keep having this dream, I'm pushin' Hailie on the swing
She keeps screaming, she don't want me to sing
"You're making Mommy cry, why? Why is Mommy crying?"
Baby, Daddy ain't leaving no more,
"Daddy you're lying"You always say that, you always say this is the last time"
But you ain't leaving no more, Daddy you're mine"
She's piling boxes in front of the door trying to block it
"Daddy please, Daddy don't leave, Daddy - no stop it!"
Goes in her pocket, pulls out a tiny necklace locket
It's got a picture, "this'll keep you safe Daddy, take it withcha'"
I look up, it's just me standing in the mirror
These fuckin' walls must be talking, cuz man I can hear 'em
They're saying "You've got one more chance to do right" - and it's tonight
Now go out there and show that you love 'em before it's too late
And just as I go to walk out of my bedroom door
It's turns to a stage, they're gone, and this spotlight is on
And I'm singing...

And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn
Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice
Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling
And I didn't feel a thing,
So baby don't feel my pain
Just smile back
And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn
Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice
Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling
And I didn't feel a thing,
So baby don't feel my pain
Just smile back...

Sixty thousand people, all jumping out their seat
The curtain closes, they're throwing roses at my feet
I take a bow and thank you all for coming out
They're screaming so loud, I take one last look at the crowd
I glance down, I don't believe what I'm seeing
"Daddy it's me, help Mommy, her wrists are bleeding,"
But baby we're in Sweden, how did you get to Sweden?
"I followed you Daddy, you told me that you weren't leavin'
"You lied to me Dad, and now you make Mommy sad"
And I bought you this coin, it says 'Number One Dad'
"That's all I wanted, I just want to give you this coin"
I get the point - fine, me and Mommy are going"
But baby wait, "it's too late Dad, you made the choice
"Now go out there and show 'em that you love 'em more than us"
That's what they want, they want you Marshall, they keep.. screamin' your name
It's no wonder you can't go to sleep, just take another pill
Yeah, I bet you you will.
You rap about it, yeah, word, k-keep it real
I hear applause, all this time I couldn't see
How could it be, that the curtain is closing on me
I turn around, find a gun on the ground, cock it
Put it to my brain and scream "die Shady" and pop it
The sky darkens, my life flashes, the plane that I was supposed to be on crashes and burns to ashes
That's when I wake up, alarm clock's ringin', there's birds singin'
It's Spring and Hailie's outside swinging,
I walk right up to Kim and kiss her
Tell her I miss her, Hailie just smiles and winks at her little sister
Almost as if to say..

And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn
Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice
Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling
And I didn't feel a thing,
So baby don't feel my pain
Just smile back
And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn
Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice
Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling
And I didn't feel a thing,
So baby don't feel my pain
Just smile back...

==============
I like his songs.
Lyrics are always interesting...

eve of eve of cny

Went for the 2nd opinion today @ far-out NUH.
Sounds more promising. At least I'm given an alternative.
Am gonna go on medication first..combi of anti-reflux and steroids..
Before deciding whether to go for op or not..Hope the med works out well.. =)

Had to do a scope today again..man the procedure is uncomfy...ugh..
Imagine having a long tubing of width 3-4mm wide being pushed through your nostril all the way down your throat.
And you have to make funny noises so that the doc can see your vocal cords..haa

Hmm..now I've to pop 10 pills every morning for the next 5 days and then about 4 for the next 9 days after that.
*bleah*

=========
After NUH, made my way to Bugis J & got myself stationeries & my Malay dictionary!
Visited the temple after that...
And then parked myself @ Breko..woohoo...shiok!
Had my fav potato with egg mayo filling!! And the Orangey drink thingy with milk!! (forgot the name liao..) =)))
Did work there..did some planning for work, did my Malay homework too...

Quite satisfied..spent a good 2.5 to 3 hours there..
In my fav seat, at my fav table..

==========
Saw YanDaoKia's advert in Mens Health whilst at Kinokuniya today..
Haha...good exposure for him...sms-ed him in evening..poor soul had to do it FOC

But hey, for this trade, gotta start out this way..after you get more exposure and after your portfolio grows fatter...
You can ask for more...Kudos ya..and jiayou!

the power of mp3

It feels nice plugging your ears with jazz..
And just digging into your work.
Blocking out whatever's happening around you.
Kinda feels surreal.

Especially when the jazz is from the Ella Fitzgerald, Miles Davis era..
Wah steady...

Not really in the mood for work just now...couldn't get up this morning.
Came into office at 1040am..Think my performance appraisal's gonna be big time shitty..haha

okok...*meek little lamb skips back to work*

Would you feel sad?

If you gave a person a pressie, and that person lost that pressie...would you feel sad?
If that person doesn't understand why you are getting upset over the loss of the pressie, would you feel sad?
If that person lost that pressie cos it wasn't taken care of properly, would you feel sad?

quotable quotes

Got these off someone else's site. Much apologies for just lifting it off from there.

"Sometimes we must get hurt in order to grow, we must fail in order to know. Sometimes our vision clears only after our eyes are washed away with tears."

In a way...you never try, you never know. You won't know if the path ahead is clear or not till you start walking. If there's a wall and you walk right into it, and get bruised or battered...Well..take your time to laugh, cry, sing about it..Shit happens to everyone I guess.

Though I really wonder why some people seem to have it better off than others. Their life is smoother...yeah sure they do get shit..but they get it lesser...hmm..or can such things be compared?

"Not all scars show, not all wounds heal, somtimes you can't always see the pain someone feels."

I spoke of 'masking' previously and how I would like to be able to grasp it.
Let's just say my face is easy to read like a book. Happy, sad, pissed, bored. It's all there.
And sometimes, unknowingly, I offend/irritate someone with my blatantness.
Well, it'll perhaps be good to learn how to mask some of my emotions..?

On a separate note, there are some persons whom I sense have such wounds which have not healed fully. Gut feel I suppose. And I feel I wanna know more. Not like I'm 38 or anything..but rather I would like to hear what they have to say and learn from their experiences...

"After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul,
And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't mean security,
And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises, And you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and your eyes open, With the grace of an adult, not the grief of a child.
You learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans.
After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much.
So, plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure... that you really are strong, and you really do have worth."

And this last one is quite interesting and meaningful.

My Wednesday

Lemme see..what happened today.

The presentation for the monthly staff meeting went smoothly.
Smoked through some portions. Gabra-ed through some portions.
But generally went okay.

Not bad siah, rushed through the slides and managed to pull it off..heee...

===========
Am going NUH on Friday. 2nd opinion.
Hope to hear something more positive..like perhaps the op won't be needed?
*clasps hands together and prays fervently*

Which reminds me..it's been quite awhile since I've visited the temple.
Yeah, think I'll do so on Friday.
After NUH, then makan, then temple, then Malay/GMAT/Stephen King at National Library!
Then maybe dinner with some peeps?

Woohoo...=)
Potent combination of activities for the eve of the eve of CNY...
Better get my MP3 fully charged...

===========
Time flies. It's been 2 months since I started taking Malay.
Just had the 8th lesson today.
2 more and I'm done with Beginners.
Hmm...just when I was getting to know the rest..

===========
Fuzz or no fuzz, that is the question....
hmm...hehehe..... =p =p =p

Yesterday

Yesterday ended on a not so good note..
Left the office around 8-plus and decided on a half-hearted state of mind that I should pop by Bugis to jalan abit.
Thought it would bring my spirits higher...think it went the other way.

Loitered around aimlessly and really just walked..
Gosh, didn't buy anything at all.
Things I wanted either had no colour or ran out of size. >:(

And to top it off, I couldn't get a cab. Ok..I can hear some tsk-tsking...but I'm a cab-queen remember? And i figured it'll get me home faster.
BUT.........
Waited, no cab, called, couldn't get through. Got through, no cab..and so the cycle went..
I ended up taking the train eventually. Back to square 1.

And I'm not exaggerating but I had a headache after frowning for so long...

mungka orang atas macham nak kena sepak

For those wondering.
That means. Orang Atas has a kiam-pah face.

And for those still wondering.
Kiam-pah means "want to get slapped".

Got quite pissed off this morning.
By someone with a low EQ. Let's call her Orang Atas...
She's smart, she's capable...I agree.
But sometimes rubs people the wrong way...

And well, just a simple email this morning from her rubbed me absolutely the wrong way.
So much so that I gave up in replying. And pushed the duty of clarification to another person.
Nevermind that I seem like an incompetent fool after her words had gotten the better of me.
Guess I've learnt to just keep my mouth shut in such instances where I can't defend myself confidently.
No use running into a brick wall.
I am not good in such war of words.
What more against a more experienced player?

In a way, I pity the peeps at CC1.
And admire their tolerance and patience too.
Apart from getting it from the callers, they get it from us too.
True that they need to provide a certain level of service to us.
But really...sometimes, it's a "cut-each-other-some-slack" situation...
You help me, I help you.

Or perhaps I'm just a really chin chye person...
And some others just aren't.
Or maybe our 8 characters clash...

spaced-out thoughts..

Got up earlier this morning to be an assistant sous chef..haha...
Was helping Mum & Dad in our annual mega-project..
The cooking of Ayam Buah Keluak.
Just thinking of the dish makes my taste buds excited..

Anyway, one wonder's why cooking Peranakan dishes is so time-consuming and takes up so much effort...
Just to cook this dish of 50 black nuts..Dad had to crack them open, I had to enlarge the hole..
And then dig out the flesh, mix it with fish paste..then stuff it back in..
And the spice paste has to be done for gravy..yada yada...

And ya, buah keluak always reminds me of Uncle Benny..

=========
Bought another cross-stitch that day..haha..
Hmm...700th day is the goal...
Aye..gotta have something to work towards...

=========
Tien Phey just messaged me to say that he transferred $$ into my account.
Gosh, then I realised I'd already forgotten that I lent him that sum of $$ 2 years back.
I know I didn't write it off. just that perhaps it kinda slipped from my mind along the way..

2 years..I remember lending to him when I was only in my 2nd month at LHUB.

=========
And yay! Got my increment!!
Muahaha...

Though that niggling feeling of whether to move on or not is still floating around consciously in my head.
Haa..can't remember who but someone told me to follow in HB's footsteps and go into teaching..
A notion which I am still adamant about.
I don't think I'll go into it lah...don't really have much affinity with kids..=)

========
Aw man...ANTICIPATION
Man U vs Liverpool...
Tonight 11:55pm. Channel 23 ESPN.

Walk on, walk on
With hope in your hearts
And you'll never walk alone

~You'll Never Walk Alone~

zzzzzz

The pig in the schizo me decided to be more dominant today..
After completing the final episode of Lovers in Paris, I zonked out..for almost 4 hours.
Got up not too long ago...and I'm still sleepy..
Haa..

The thought of heading back to work tomorrow brings a slight dread and a certain sense of boredom.
It's been especially so for the last few weeks.

Hope I can work out the rental deal though. At least I'll feel happier bringing in some $$ for the company. Might be a small amount..but at least it's still revenue..

==========
Was quite surprised that Dasao and Adrian made that comment yesterday at mama's bday celebration..
Straight in ahboy's face.
Haha...see lah, now he's so conscious about his complexion..

========
To get or not to get??
Canon Ixus i55
chio...

==========
Hmm..I hope to be able to go shopping at Bugis tomorrow.
Soak myself in some therapeutic shopping and aimless walking...
Maybe I can park myself at the library after that..? Sip some tea at Han's and read a book, or bring my GMAT.
Hmm..then again nah..GMAT is heavy..will leave that for another day..haha..

~friday~

It's nice to end the day on a good note.

Had another uni gang gathering just now..just talking..
Time flies..7 years ago that I met them..and never knew they would end up making up a large part of my life..=)

Ate at Nooch and then ended up at Bakers Inn munching on desserts...

=========
Back at home, as I stare at the pics of my scan/scope...
I think to myself..am I making a big fuss?
But I really hope that it'll not affect my intended trip...sighzz

=========
Was very happy too when a gf of mine shared that her guy has popped the question to her..whilst they were holidaying overseas. So sweet...hee...Somehow when I heard the news, I was just elated..and excited for them!

And it's funny..cos I just mentioned to ahboy that day that how come no one I'm close to is getting married? Or has the intention to? And then suddenly, the news came...

=) cheers man cheers...

=========
Damn, been eating alot again.
I think a large bulk of my expenses are on food..argh...think next month, grass'll be my staple diet..

CMI liao..
Off to dreamland...
zzz...

it's a slow TGIF morning...

Kinda feel abit defeated..deflated..sombre..
I dunno what is the correct word to use...

Am back in the office after a visit to ENT.
Most likely, need to go for another op again.
First reaction was: What the fuck?!?! Gan Puah Suay!?!?!??
Just gotten over one and now there's another? Got so zun bo?

Got a growth in my throat..
Doc mentioned that during my stay in ICU previously, the tubing in my throat most likely caused a laceration/ulcer in my voicebox.
And over time, it didn't get well.
And then, through infection/inflammation, it developed into a growth.

Sigh..what more can I say?

Felt kinda shitty just now when I first heard the news.
Feeling better now though...
After talking to him and doing some work...