~Fate plays its hands...am a puppet left to dangle~
I really don't know what to say anymore. I cannot take unexpected turn of events. The op has been delayed again. AGAIN. That is the keyword. AGAIN. 3rd time. For the fucking 3rd time. And this time round, it's me. Cos I fell sick. Out of 2 whole months to fall sick, I have to fall sick 3 days before D-day. I just wanna bang my head against a wall.
It's frustrating. Now I'm at a loss of how to handle my leave. I can't possibly be going back to work for like 8-10 days, then running off again? Think I'll have to eat into my annual leave..And it's difficult having to tell others again that it's been delayed again...macham as if I'm playing a trick on them...I know it's not within my control..but tamade gan suay lor...the timing has to be so bloody zun...Pple have been sending sms wishes since morning...since last night even..it's tiring having to tell pple about it..needless to say frustrating having to repeat everything a thousand and one times.
I know ahboy will say "it's not within our control". And I know heng will say "ai zhai...". but I still can't help it..and mum is insisting that I try to change the date from 11th to 4th..cos 11th oct happens to be my lunar birthday. 9th day of lunar 9th month....arrggghhhhh....been bugging me...Please. Just spare me can?? Please? Just spare me.
Am leaking like a tap now. Just got shouted at. I'm on house arrest for the next 2 weeks. What the fuck? What the god-damn fuck??? %^$#^##!!%&~**~^(&
And I'll be spending my birthday in hospital. My 25th birthday. My quarter of a century brthday. How sweet. How exciting. And oh..How refreshing. Yeah.
I really can't help ranting now. Is 2005 a test for me?
I mean..things have just been going haywire after CNY. Home PC crashed on me, office laptop crashed on me, old handphone crashed on me, lost my new handphone, work ain't very smooth either, collapsed in office, got this stupid medical condition, need to go for op, need to be on medication everyday, op kena delayed 3 times, drifting apart from family, more arguments with ahboy, more quarrels with friends, blah blah..
I'm losing faith..
If everything happens for a reason...please enlighten me...what might that reason be??
2 comments:
ree-lax lah... i say "tree" is a lucky number - steady aka ai-zhai.
the reason? quarter-life crisis, i guess... and if u wish to seek enlightenment frm me, u might wanna check out http://volition.blogspot.com/2004/05/being-twenty-something.html
not trying to ridicule but try washing the charcoal clean. it builds patience.
(Y)
(^.^)
that's all u need. ("')("')
Thanks for the encouragement yeah..
ai zhai ai zhai..
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