friends...relationships...

it used to frustrate me and distress me...
even as recently as last year...
when you wanted to be friends with someone...
but the other party didn't seem to want to...

much like how a little child would pout or throw a tantrum...
if a peer would not want to share his biscuit with him..
or would not hold his hand while in a school line-up..
or would not want to be "friends" with him..

and it finally dawned upon me that well..
you can be good with some...but you can't be good with everybody...
very much like how you can please some..
but you can't please everybody.

so if for the longest time...if you speak to someone..
and you get mono syllable replies...
or if you only get nods of the heads without any eye contact even..
then perhaps it's high time to just let it be...

some things are just not meant to happen.

ok, it took me awhile..
maybe i am just obstinate..
maybe i am just too eager for people to accept me...
maybe i care too much about how people see me...

but i'm learning..
i'm learning...
to put it crudely and crassly...
fuck it if you don't like me..

haha..perhaps i'm not those born with a "everybody loves me" star...
so i'll just spend my time nurturing those relationships that mean so much more..
caring for those people who appreciate it
and loving those who have stood by me all these while...