Who am I?

I have to admit I teared in hospital just now.

Stepped into Gran's ward and she called me "Celine!".
That's my cousin's name. I visit her every single week, much more than my cousin.
And I get remembered less.

I corrected her and she stuck out her tongue.
Said she's getting old & getting more blur.

She's really hard of hearing now. I don't know why.
When she was in the Home, she was still manageable in her right ear.
I was exasperated just now. Words couldn't get through to her.
I only "spoke" to her through actions & signals.

Managed to ask her what's my name later on.
"Siew Lay" was the reply. That's my aunt's dialect name.
One which nobody uses cos my aunt's got a Christian name anyway.
How the hell did that pop out of Gran's mouth when no one really calls my aunt by that?
And yes, it is not my name at all.

You can't help but feel hurt. Even though you know she's got early dementia.

Was told by the nurses that she managed to slip out of bed in the middle of the night yesterday.
The railings were all up. How she did it, nobody knows.
Maybe there was a little gap where she squeezed through.

Bottomline is, she did not manage to go to the toilet.
She walked to the sink outside the toilet and urinated on the dustbin.
Must have thought it was the toilet bowl.

They have to wheel her whole bed near to the nurses counter outside later on tonight.
It's the only way. Else she might sneak out of bed on her own again.
She fell once and was lucky to get through it with a hip-op and 3 months of rest in hospital.
Another time and it might be a no-go situation.

I might pop by tomorrow evening again. Or maybe Saturday morning.
Wonder what name I will be called then.